go directly to jail
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In lieu of an opening monologue — there’s far too…
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Opening monologue: You might have thought that you have all…
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Opening monologue: We have to confront reality, and be strong…
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Opening monologue: We need to be able to ask our…
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No opening monologue today! Instead, we roll right into a…
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So like, I’m lazy as shit and I’ve never willingly…
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Opening monologue: Love is the most wonderful excitement, but it…
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Oh my God, I have been waiting to use this…
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Opening monologue: Why are we so afraid of love? We…
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Opening monologue: It’s okay if you fuck up, because every…
