Mia and Manuel have given in to their worse instincts and started making out, even though their fighting and also Manuel has the flu. Think of the germs, Mia! All is well, until Manuel calls Mia “Romina.” Yikes! That said, Mia girl, you don’t have to start screaming “I HATE YOU!!!” and running out of the room all dramatic. Then she starts sneezing. Wow, that is a fast-acting cold.
Lujan, meanwhile, is waiting in the main hall with a baseball bat in hand. The return of violent Lujan! Give it to me! Marizza walks in and she’s like, “Yikes, hand over the bat,” but it’s too late — Fernanda comes in and Lujan jumps her. Enter Marcos, who of course doesn’t believe Lujan when she says that Fernanda made her miss tea with them. That would, you know, put an end to all this drama quickly and sensibly. Fernanda says she left Lujan a note outside her door, and there it is. Marizza and Marcos both take Fernanda’s side, which…eh. Is Lujan acting nuts? Yes. Is it weird that everyone’s choosing to forget that Fernanda’s also nuts and manipulative? Also yes. Marcos tells Lujan they can’t keep going like this.
Feli comes back from her date with Alex, gushing about how well it went. “Did you hook up?” Pilar and Sol want to know. “Yes,” Feli says. “Kissing?” Pilar asks. “No,” Feli says. Sol and Pilar groan that hooking up does not mean what Feli thinks it means. But! He did give her a bracelet, which Feli now has to hide from Mia. Then Mia comes in, Pilar not at all subtly grabs Feli’s wrist, and she and Sol scoot closer so it really just makes it more obvious that Feli was hanging out with them. Nice going, guys.
Lujan walks in on Marcos and Fernanda having lunch together and flips out. I mean — yeah, Lujan’s acting irrationally jealous, but at the same time, is everyone forgetting what a dick Fernanda is? I can imagine her not being wild about her boyfriend hanging out with a girl who bullies her, even if it’s strictly platonic. Whatever. Anyway, Fernanda flounces off, and Marcos gets all pissy at Lujan for making a scene. Lujan storms out, and Fernanda pauses to be all, “Our evil plan is working! Mwa ha ha!” over in the corner to Sol and Pilar. Nobody seems to notice this. Sol and Pilar officially invite her to join their group, and Fernanda accepts.
Francisco waltzes in and tells Laura that he got his keys back from Lola — and funny, she doesn’t know any Mumi, even though Laura’s been dating him for two years now. Laura and Marizza are like, “Yikes, did not think this through.”
Bianca comes back to school, and Lola jumps on her in excitement. Aw! Their love is so real. Lola gushes to Bianca that she and Francisco are working together to solve the mystery of Laura’s fake boyfriend, and they’re totally going to fall in love while they’re on the case. They’ll be like Nancy Drew and Frank Hardy! (I guess that makes Dante Ned. Man, I shouldn’t do Ned like that.)
Mia cries to Feli and Vico about Manuel calling her Romina. She’s all like, “How very dare!” and called a doctor and a housekeeper to watch him, because IT IS TOO MUCH for her to do so when he doesn’t love her! I mean, and she’s also a high school student who has to go to class. You’d think someone would’ve thought of that. Mia decides, for maybe the eightieth time, that she has to forget Manuel. Then she asks after Vico’s weekend, and while Vico didn’t explicitly see her dad grab her stepmom, she was super freaked out by the yelling and the crying baby, and she’s not so sure she wants to live there.
Then Blas comes in and says he has to talk to Mia NOW. Ugh. Was he even in the last episode? I love when I can go at least twenty minutes without seeing his stupid face.
Papa B comes to school and he’s like, “What up, my son! Just came by to tell you that if you lose the election, you’re dead to me.” Pablo and Tomás storm off in a huff, and Guido pulls Papa B aside and promises to rig the election for Pablo. Like…just to be nice? It’s unclear.
Maybe the reason Papa B and Guido get along so well is because they have the same hair.
Blas is all yelling at Mia because she doesn’t want his creepy pedophile dick. Their inappropriate relationship is over! Mia’s like, “But can’t we still be friends without you perving on me?” and Blas is like, “No! How dare you be hung up on someone your own age! #friendzone #niceguysfinishlast” Hilda walks by and overhears their conversation — more specifically, hears the part where Blas is the one ending things. She goes to Carmen about it and is like, “You were right, Mia is such a temptress! Blas is pure and innocent!” and Carmen snarls that she knew Mia was one of those girls as soon as she saw her. Carmen has serious issues and should not be working with children; on the other hand, she is horribly realistic in that regard.
Then Gloria comes in and complains to them about being single and lonely. Carmen and Hilda are both like, “I feel that,” Hilda because she was widowed literally on her wedding night and Carmen because her personality is horrendous. Carmen suggests that they have a girls’ night out. That is hilarious. Man, I’m also single and lonely, but you wouldn’t catch me going out with Carmen.
Rocco is filming himself giving a dramatic monologue in the bathroom mirror while he brushes his teeth. HEE! Rocco has grown on me like a fungus, dudes. Feli comes in and asks for Rocco’s help getting Alex’s bracelet off — ah, because it’s one of those spiked bracelets that emo kids wear, and Feli assumes that as a fellow emo kid, Rocco knows how to undo the clasp. Also hee. She doesn’t want Mia or Vico to see it, because then she would have to explain why she’s dating a goth instead of a prep. Never shall the twain meet, you know. Nevertheless, she gushes to Rocco that she really likes Alex. Ominously, Rocco’s camera keeps filming from the bathroom counter.
Dunoff asks Gloria to guard the ballot box with her life while he steps out for a minute. Okay, his first mistake was to ask Gloria to give a single shit about anything that goes on at this school. Except apparently she does, and she can’t even stay in the same room as the ballot box because the temptation is too strong to see who won the election. So she leaves, and then Guido sneaks in through the window and takes out some of the votes for Marizza. Uh…but then won’t it be obvious that not everyone voted? Whatever. These kids are always playing hooky, so I guess they can’t tell.
Sonia emos some more to Andres about how wrong Papa C did her and how mean she was to Marizza. She wails that she doesn’t know what she did wrong in her life to end up so alone, without a husband, without friends, pushing away her daughter, etc. I mean…Sonia is an incredibly abrasive person without a shred of responsibility or regard for those around her. I feel bad for her and all, but I’m just saying. Andres calls Marizza and tries to get her to see Sonia, but Marizza’s like, “I will never forgive her!” and hangs up on him.
Francisco pretends to be all concerned that he called the school where Laura’s boyfriend supposedly goes, but there’s no one there by that name! Could her boyfriend be missing, or dead? Or made up? Laura’s like, “Stop saying words,” and runs off.
Rocco gives Vico a tape to watch, which is a little weird because A) that would assume that she has a video camera and B) the show forgets that Mia has a video camera and the ensuing scene is really weird. They’re interrupted by Carmen starting class, and she stops to side-eye Mia and snip that she needs to put her hair up and take off her makeup, because she’s basically soliciting sex just by sitting there. Marizza snarks, “But she needs to keep her hair down to keep that single neuron she has from falling out!” I like how if a teacher bullies any other student, Marizza gets all het up and wants to protest in the streets, but when it’s Mia, she joins in. Hypocrisy? Marizza? Say it ain’t so.
Mia huffs but goes to the bathroom to comply. She gets a call from the housekeeper, saying that Manuel wants to see her, as he’s not feeling well. “When he dies, then you can call me!” Mia snaps. Dang! Then she finds Rocco’s video camera still sitting on the counter.
Despite proposing a girls’ night together, Carmen gives just Hilda and Gloria invitations to her sister’s club. Hilda’s wary about staying up past 9 PM or whenever old people go to sleep, but Gloria talks her into going. “Fine, I’ll come with you,” Hilda grouses, and Gloria squeals and hugs her. Aw!
Marizza (and Pablo? It’s unclear) is spacing out during Carmen’s lecture, and lapses into yet another trippy dream sequence. She’s wearing her uniform, but like…with fishnets on her arms? To make it fancy? I don’t understand this show’s costuming. Anyway, the whole thing is a metaphor for wondering who will win the election. Cool, I’m glad we spent time on that.
Are…Pablo and Marizza destined to end up like Dunoff and Gloria? Is that what we’re doing here?
I guess it was Pablo’s dream after all, because back in reality, Carmen snaps at him for daydreaming. “What were you thinking about?” she asks, and Pablo tries to smooth his way out of it: “I was just thinking about what I’ll do, when I’m president, to improve things for the teachers.” Nice one. “The only thing that will help the teachers’ situation is for you to focus on your schoolwork,” Carmen snarks back. Heh.
Mia waltzes back in, hiding Rocco’s camera behind her back. She mixes up the tapes and naturally, when she starts playing the video, it’s of Rocco and Feli talking in the bathroom. Mia is shocked and appalled that Feli lied to her, especially over something as important as boys! They confront Feli, and…what the fuck, she’s still wearing the bracelet! What was even the point of this, then? Anyway, Feli runs away before they can get a straight answer out of her.
(Guido tries to snark at Carmen, about their first reading: “First? One’s not enough?” “Don’t try to be funny, Lassen.” “No, it was just a question, to break the tension.” “The next time I hear any more verbal incontinence coming out of your mouth, I’m giving you a 1.” Why must Carmen give me such good one-liners, while being such a terrible person?)
After class, Marizza has to go and meet with Martavio. She’s finished her sculpture, which is just a bunch of clay balls stuck to a page, titled “Monument to Elite Way, the Biggest Snot Ball in the Universe, and its Snot Satellites.” Martavio asks why she’s at Elite Way if she hates it so much — it can’t be because of her mom, because he’s eavesdropped on their conversations and knows Marizza’s pissed at her. Marizza’s like, “What the fuck, man? Boundaries.” Martavio threatens to bring her offensive sculpture to Dunoff unless Marizza goes and makes up with her mom right now.
Lola decides to stalk Francisco some more, and look in his notebook for proof that he loves her. You know how boys like to write “Francisco + Lola 4Ever” and “Mr. Lola Arregui” all over their notebooks. All she finds, though, is the mystery locker key in Francisco’s notebook. She’s like, “OMG, could this key have been Francisco’s all along?”
Diego randomly shoves himself between Marcos and Francisco and makes a face at them, probably just because he’s realized that he’s slowly fading away into nothingness, just like Random Amanda before him, and is trying to remind them he exists. After that weirdness, Augustina rocks up to Guido and reminds him that she lent him money so he could buy a present for her dad. When was this? Whatever, I don’t care. Also, wouldn’t the present just be from her, then? Also whatever. Now that they’re broken up, Guido won’t be meeting her dad, ergo she wants the money back. Guido BSes that he doesn’t have it with him, for reasons, the actual reason being of course that he doesn’t have it at all. Augustina lets him off with a reminder that she will be back for it, and Pablo and Tomás derp that Guido should just find something around the school and pass it off as the present he bought, as that’ll be easier than scrounging up the money.
Lola tries the key on Francisco’s locker, and it opens it. Wait for it…wait for it…”Wait! All the locker keys are the same! So I must have just mixed up the mystery key with Francisco’s!” Sigh. SIGH. Francisco runs up and is like, “I can explain!” and Lola’s like, “I already figured it out! I thought this was the mystery key, but it’s just your key and you totally weren’t out with Lola this weekend!” Francisco’s like, “…yes, that’s it exactly.”
Mia confronts Feli about lying to her. As ever, Feli was scared to tell Mia because of her reaction, and Mia’s reaction is to be pissed that Feli lied but not upset over what she’s actually saying. This has happened like fifty times by now. Anyway, Feli says she was scared because she knows Mia won’t like Alex — even though, spiked bracelets aside, Alex looks like every other guy on this show. Mia runs off to talk to Vico about it, and grouses that Feli likes, “an alternative boy.” Heh. Vico nervously asks what Mia said to Feli — not that Vico likes alternative boys, but like, if she did, you know — and Mia’s like, “Well, if Feli likes him, we have to understand her, even though how could you like someone who dresses like that!” Mia? You dated Manuel “Orange Pants” Aguirre. There is no room for judgment here.
Marizza goes to see Sonia and they make up. It’s very moving and emotional and all that. Andres shows up at the very end and is like, “My machinations worked!” even though they didn’t at all, and Martavio did all the heavy lifting, but whatever.
Feli cries to Pilar that Mia doesn’t accept her love for emo boys, and Mia is her best friend and made Feli who she is (she like, invented her!), so how can Feli leave her? Pilar’s like, “You can’t stand for this! You need to stand on your own! Or join another group, led by a different blonde girl!” Sadly for Pilar, Mia cuts in on her manipulation session and makes up with Feli as Pilar seethes.
Then Guido comes in and announces that the votes are being counted. OH MY GOD, FINALLY. I can’t believe they just let that ballot box sit in the office for like ten episodes.
Martavio asks Gloria to see Marizza’s file. Even though his intense interest in one of the students should be setting off alarm bells, Gloria’s thirsty ass wants Martavio’s body, so she hands it over to him anyway. Wait, I just reread that sentence and realized that at no point in this show have they ever been concerned about the students’ well-being. Ha! Oh, I really need to get more sleep.
Dunoff and Blas count the votes. Ah, I totally forgot Argentina does tally marks by making those little boxes. It’s funny the stuff you notice when you go other places, that sort of slips your mind and then when you see it again, you’re like, “Oh, right, they do that.” Anyway, Pablo predictably wins, and Lujan’s all, “No puede ser!” She says it must be fraud, but when Marizza tries to protest, Dunoff and Blas are like, “Shh, don’t make us think about this election any more than we have to.” Oh, and before they celebrate, Dunoff wants to announce that boys and girls will now be forbidden from having P.E. together or hanging out in each other’s dorm halls, to keep them from jumping each other. Was that not already a rule? Whatever.
Manuel calls the school and asks Gloria to send Mia home, but not to mention anything about Manuel having a cold. Because that would like, make sense, and not make it extra dramatic when she sees him.
The second class is over, Lujan explains to Marizza that the wrong number of votes was counted (I told you it would be easy to tell!), and…they somehow identify Guido as the perpetrator? I don’t know how they get there, but they do. Marizza flips out and attacks Guido. So much violence in this episode! Reminds me of the good old days! Martavio has to pull Marizza off Guido, and he drags her off for yet another talk.
Vico watches the video that Rocco actually meant to give her, which is of him singing and playing the guitar. She’s all charmed by him, and he waltzes into her room all, “Girls love rock music and having their boundaries violated!” Then Belen comes in, sees them together, and is like, “Ooookay…anyway, I have an invitation for Vico, Mia, and Feli.” It turns out that Sol’s group is organizing a makeover party and inviting all the girls. Vico’s like, “The fuck is this?” and Rocco’s like, “You’re so hot when you’re indignant.” Vico yells at him that she doesn’t like him and to get out, but once he leaves, she smiles to herself. Ugh. Do I love how cute Rocco and Vico are, or so I hate this “no means yes” bullshit? Both, but mostly the second one, I think.
Pablo, Tomás, and Guido wait in Dunoff’s office to be disciplined for fighting, by which I mean Dunoff will probably be like, “Fighting NEVER happens at Elite Way School! And it will continue to have never happened, because we are just going to ignore this and move on.” Pablo’s all emo because Marizza’s upset over losing, and he still liiiikes her. He’s like, “I thought I saw…~something~ in her face,” and Guido’s like, “Whatever, she’s a girl, her feelings don’t count.” Guido’s just determined to make me hate him, isn’t he?
Then Augustina comes in demanding her money, and Guido’s like, “Uh, uh, I already used it to buy a present!” and Tomás grabs one of Dunoff’s fancy pens off his desk and is like, “Here it is!” Augustina is actually impressed by how fancy the pen is, and Guido is off the hook, except for the part where now Dunoff’s pen is gone and they have no way of replacing it.
Martavio takes Marizza into the teachers’ lounge to talk about her violent reaction to Pablo winning, and Marizza breaks down and cries that no matter how much she protests, Elite Way is messy and corrupt and she can’t fix it. She’s fed up with trying and trying and everyone still being against her. Oh, wow, a genuine character moment! This is a really good point and shown very well here. Martavio pulls her into a hug, and then Sonia walks in to a scare chord. Hmm, what could the problem be? Personally, you could definitely read Martavio’s interest in Marizza as grooming, but we all know this show doesn’t care about that, so maybe they’re just trying to trick me into thinking Sonia’s surprised.
Gloria and Hilda go to the club, and Hilda is freaked out by all the couples! Sitting together! Kissing over dinner! ON THE LIPS! Seriously, though, between the dark room and the contemporary music playing, this is not the kind of place I can picture Carmen at at all. Then the lights go down some more, and a show starts, and Gloria and Hilda are SHOCKED AND APPALLED! Omg, did Carmen send them to a strip club?
Papa B comes by to congratulate Pablo on winning, and as a present, he’s giving Pablo…his very own apartment! What is with parents on this show just giving their teenagers their own places? I would not want to leave Guido unsupervised in any place I owned. Pablo, Guido, and Tomás are all hype about how they’re gonna party hard until they have liver poisoning and too many STDs to count. Papa B tells Pablo to thank Guido, too, for giving him a hand, which brings Pablo up short: “What do you mean?” Ah, Guido. Your fall from grace was fast and beautiful.
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