Opening monologue: None today! It’s all action, all the time here in Rebelde Way. I mean, for once.
We open with Etchamendi and Dunoff trying to fire Mansilla. All the students come in and are like, “You’ll have to go through us!” All the excitement stresses Etchamendi out, and he collapses on the floor. Mansilla tells the students to call an ambulance, so they run out of the office and…start gossiping about it with some rando who has never existed before this episode. Luckily, Etchamendi’s already regained consciousness after like five minutes. That was a speedy recovery from a heart attack! Renata overhears the kids gossiping and runs off to see Etchamendi. Mansilla tells her to back off, and Renata snaps at Mansilla that Etchamendi is her brother. Is there a reason she couldn’t just say that? And the entire time she was letting everyone think they were banging on the DL. Dunoff’s like, “Impossible, Etchamendi’s dad only has one kid!…oh.”
Feli rants to Mia about Luna finding her candy stash, and Mia’s not hugely sympathetic. She’s like, “Whatever, it’s just Luna,” and Feli’s like, “She’s dead to me!!!!” Oh! Kay! Mia finds Luna and asks what’s up; Luna tells her that she suspects Feli’s not really on a diet. Then Feli comes storming in and starts crazying about how Luna’s trying to turn all her friends against her; Mia sides with Luna again, which does not please Feli at all. Feli storms out and once again, everyone’s like, “Herp derp how can Feli possibly be losing weight if she’s still stuffing her face? HOW?”
Meanwhile, Nico’s mom and Sandra are having an awkward coffee. We’ve all been there, really. Sandra immediately gets on Mama Provenza’s case for not letting Nico be happy; Mama Provenza is like, “He’s throwing away his entire future on a high school relationship! Unlike his seventh-grade relationship with Tatiana, which was totally legit.” Sandra tells Mama Provenza to talk to Nico about Luna, and if she doesn’t, Sandra will. Mama Provenza is like, “How dare you meddle!” and Sandra’s like, “Are you new? That’s all we do around here!”
After class, Marizza, Luna, Belen, and Random Amanda play Truth or Dare together. I like how Belen and Random Amanda just float to whatever friend group they’re needed in, regardless of who they’ve hung out with before. Marizza dares Lujan to kiss Marcos when she sees him, or at least tell them honestly if she liiiiikes him. Lujan’s like, “I love nothing!” and runs off. Then Fernanda swings by just to randomly be like, “Wow, Marizza, your mom’s really hot, what happened with you?” Marizza gets pissed and storms off. Pablo observes this with interest.
At Casa Colucci, Papa C and Mercedes are still fighting over Sonia. Or maybe this is an entirely different fight about Sonia. WHO CARES. Sonia sends them tickets to her show in thanks, and Mercedes gets all huffy, but eventually Papa C convinces her that their meetup was no big deal. Mercedes promises to be nicer to Mia, and they make up and don’t break up and I die slowly.
Pablo finds Marizza being emo in the sad trailer, listening to “Mi vida.” She sniffles to him that his song is right: her life is her own, and her mom can’t cut her wings! That…doesn’t seem like the right lesson to be taking away from her self-esteem issues. Pablo’s like, “My dad’s literally abusive, so maybe don’t come to me whining about your mom.” But more nicely. He points out that Sonia loves Marizza a lot, which Marizza doesn’t take too well.
Meanwhile, even after their heart-to-heart, Sonia’s like, “I’m still a crappy mother, so I should probably still go to Spain.” Man, if the sad piano music can’t fix all this, what can? Luca swings by with some good news: Sonia’s new employers in Spain also offered Luca a job, so he won’t just be bumming around mooching off of her. Prediction: Sonia will have an attack of conscience and stay in Argentina, and Luca will fuck off to the abyss of disappeared exes Spain, and that’s how they’ll break up.
All the kids (except Pilar) gather ’round Mansilla and ask him what the deal is with his family. To the surprise of no one, Mansilla isn’t actually a murderer. He was married and had a kid, and they lived in the US while he was studying. One day they went up to the mountains on vacation, and got into a car crash. Mansilla lived; his wife and kid didn’t. He was too distraught to defend himself during the investigation, so it…somehow…was resolved as a murder that…Mansilla didn’t have to do time for? Maybe he means manslaughter. Anyway, Renata comes in just in time to hear this sad story. I bet she feels like a dick now. She tells Mansilla that Etchamendi is doing fine, and they need to talk. God, that’s a horrible sweater she’s wearing.
Like, it looks like a happenstance of early 2000s video quality but no, there is a random red Lego patch on the shoulder of that sweater for no reason I can see.
You’ll recall that Pilar wants to leave school, as everyone hates her even more now than they did before. I think she’s forgetting the part where this is entirely her own fault, but whatever. Dunoff refuses to send her elsewhere: “This is an institution of the highest academic level!” HA! Pilar wails that they’re being especially mean to her now that Mama D is a teacher, and Dunoff immediately latches on to that: maybe Mama D should just resign! Mama D’s like, “I didn’t read The Feminine Mystique for this bullshit!”
As predicted, Renata does feel like a dick. She tells him she’ll have Etchamendi deal with Dunoff, and offers to tell Mansilla part of her shady past to make them even. Her deep, dark, equivalent-to-manslaughter secret turns out to be that…she’s Etchamendi’s illegitimate half-sister. Mansilla’s like, “Wow, that’s not nearly as bad as mine.” He doesn’t give a shit about her secret, and snaps that it would be good for her to learn to apologize when she’s wrong.
Nico and Luna study together in the not-library and are all nerdily twitterpated by math. Luna leaves her jacket, and when she comes back to get it, Mama Provenza swoops out of fucking nowhere and is like, “Stay away from my son! You’re blinding him with science math!” She calls Luna quite a rude word (“zorrita“), too. This is really not a kids’ show, despite what the preschool-esque interior design would have you believe. Luna’s like, “Wow, what’s with calling me, a 15-year-old girl, offensive names?” Mama Provenza crazies about how Luna will never be with Nico, no matter how much Sandra tries to meddle.
Papa C and Mercedes go to Sonia’s show. Marizza sneaks onto the stage in the middle of the show, and I guess she took Pablo’s advice after all, because she tells everyone that she loves her mom and Sonia has never held her back. She asks her not to leave the country, and there’s much crying and hugging. Papa C is all moved by this, which does not make Mercedes happy at all.
After Sonia’s show, everyone rains praise on Marizza, including Papa C. They all leave, but Mercedes lingers to get up in Sonia’s face some more. She says that since Sonia is staying in Buenos Aires, she has to back off on “Mercedes’s husband.” Sonia’s like, “Husband? Since when?” and Mercedes is like, “We’re totally married, he just doesn’t know it yet!” Sonia’s like, “Fine, whatever.” Papa C hears the tail end of this conversation, and is happy that Sonia doesn’t reveal the extent of their meeting to Mercedes.
Over in Pablo’s room, Tomás notes that Pablo is looking pretty emo. Pablo brushes it off as concern for Guido, but Tomás is like, “Please, we haven’t brought him up in like two episodes, what’s really going on?” He’s like, “Is it a girl?” and starts listing off all the girls it could be: Flor (who?), Paula (I think he’s breaking some cosmic rule of this show by acknowledging one of Pablo’s exes), or Clarissa (WHO?). Are any of them Random Amanda’s real name? Anyway, Pablo mishears that last name and snaps that he’s not thinking about Marizza at all! Tomás is like, “Well, good, ’cause she would never go out with you, on account of hating you and all.” Pablo’s like, “How very dare, I bring all the girls to the yard!” He bets Tomás his CD collection (hee!) that he can get Marizza to date him. Oh, good, a bet! Those always end well. I mean, it worked for Heath Ledger, but Pablo is no Heath Ledger. I’m not even sure he’s Freddie Prinze Jr.
Mia takes a page out of Manuel’s stalking handbook and tells Vico that they have to watch Feli day and night. Feli overhears them talking about her and flips out, and Vico quickly changes the subject to Guido: don’t they miss him, even a little? Mia and Feli are like, “…not really.” Feli starts teasing Vico about liking Guido. It’s funny — and weird — how every now and then they’ll hint that Vico and Guido are going to get together, and then completely forget about it. Mia thinks Guido is gross, and Vico’s like, “I mean, you’re dating Blas.” “Vico 1, Mia 0,” Feli snarks. Hee!
The next day, Luna finds out that Marizza was the one to tell Sandra about her love drama, and says she doesn’t want any more meddling in her life. Ha! Oh, Luna, that’s never going to happen unless you change your name and leave the country.
Marcos returns to school, and everyone’s all happy to see him. He tries to talk to Lujan, but she keeps finding ways to evade him. She runs off to Diego and tells him that she needs him to pretend to have a crush on her. He’s like, “This is the most I’ve ever gotten to do in any episode ever, so…sure.” She tells him to do whatever he thinks will make it look like he likes her, so he kisses her. Lujan’s like, “EXCEPT THAT!”
Sonia and Luca talk about her not leaving, and Luca says he won’t go either. No! Dammit, Luca, you have to go! I said you would, and I won’t be made a fool of! Sonia, God love her, says that if they’re really meant to be, the distance won’t matter, and he shouldn’t ditch this chance so quickly. Okay, but I mean…weren’t they planning on moving to Spain permanently? Does she plan on doing long-distance with him until one of them retires? It’s unclear.
Marizza gets a text from Facundo, asking her to call him. Jesus, Facundo, please accept your exile to the abyss of no-longer-needed tertiary characters. He tells her that he’s found a car for them to drag-race against Simon, and she’s all chipper. No word yet on whether or not Facundo still thinks this will get him a date with Marizza. Pablo and Tomás come into the cafeteria and Pablo tries to make nice with Marizza, and woefully strikes out. She’s still pissed about his refusal to drag race, I guess, but you’d think she’d soften a little given his attempt at a pep talk about Sonia.
Hilda and Mansilla have a little heart-to-heart about his tragic past, and Hilda tells him that he’s not a bad person. Just look at all the various students and faculty he’s saved from expulsion, drugs, and generally bad life decisions! She encourages him to keep having faith and all that jazz.
Luna has to intimidate Cata (not like that’s hard), but she finds Sandra and chews her out for getting involved in Luna’s life. She rightfully points out that Sandra always wanted Luna to stand up for herself, so she has to let Luna make her own decisions now. And Luna has decided that the best thing for her is Tomás! I mean…that kind of just proves that Luna shouldn’t be making her own decisions, but okay.
Facundo rolls up in the car he’s found for Marizza: a really old sedan that says “DRIVING ON THE EDGE” on it. Hee! He’s also wearing leather pants again. How Marizza does not just turn around and walk away, I do not know. Pablo comes out of nowhere (seriously, they’re like in the middle of the woods) and tries to hit on Marizza again. She blows him off, and Tomás cackles in the background. Later, Pablo walks in on Tomás on his side of the room, and Tomás snarks that he’s “enjoying his new CD collection.” Hee! I kind don’t blame Luna for liking Tomás, after all. Pablo says he needs some more time, and they settle on a week before the bet is over.
Mansilla brings some flowers into the teachers’ lounge; he and Renata coldly exchange greetings. The second he walks out Renata jumps up and reads the card with the flowers. They’re for Hilda, thanking her for being there for him and all that, and Renata gets a weird look on her face. Hilda, though, doesn’t read the entirety of the card (Mansilla signed the back, like a dingus), and assumes they’re from Hilario. She leaves a message at his house thanking him, which Renata overhears. Even she knows this is “yikes” territory, and she tells Mansilla. They put aside their differences to both be horrified.
Back in the lounge, Diego tries to rock up on Lujan while she’s talking to Marizza, and she tells him to fuck off. Then Marcos shows up and Lujan’s like, “Hold up, Diego!” Marcos, God love him, is not deterred, and hovers awkwardly while they play Pac-Man or whatever that hugeass game is. Speaking of unwanted suitors, then Pablo shows up. He strikes out with Marizza yet again — this time suggesting that she’s scared of Facundo’s car — and Tomás snickers. In revenge, Marizza texts Facundo, pretending to be Pablo, and says he’ll race the car. And lest you were concerned that an episode might go by without her, Avril Lavigne is playing in the background.
Mama D stops Mia in the hall and asks if the class hates Pilar because her parents are a teacher and the principal, respectively. Mia’s like, “No, not at all! We hate her for a totally different reason!” Oh, Mia. She tells Mama D that Pilar planted the newspaper in Dunoff’s office, and no one will forgive her for snitching.
Pablo hits up his dad’s secretary to find out more about Marizza and Facundo’s race. Tomás notes that he’s far more interested in this than he has to be, and Pablo’s like, “I don’t like Marizza!” Man, when even Tomás isn’t fooled, you know it’s bad. Tomás leaves to go do something contrived, and someone dressed in the Society’s robes comes in. Scare chord! You’d think, with all the shenanigans surrounding the Society, they’d be less lax about people wearing black hoods wandering around the school.
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