So Pablo proposed to Marizza that they should try to be friends this year, and then has promptly decided to be a dick to her at every turn. Marizza for some reason is still trying to be nice to him and offers to hear out his parental woes. Pablo yells at her that he doesn’t NEED her help, because I guess when he said they should be friends, he meant like…the friends that don’t talk to each other.
Manuel and Mia took a boat to some island that is not the island they were already on, so they could make out in a new and exciting location, but Manuel forgot to tie the boat and now they’re stranded, not that they know it yet. I like how they need to create suspense, so this magical tropical vacation is just one misadventure after another. They pass a tree that has “M + M” carved into it, and are like, “Omg, our love is so real!” Manuel wants to leave their own heart on the island, because of a legend of two lovers that he told Mia earlier but I skipped over because it was boring. Mia’s like, “Didn’t they die in that story?” and Manuel’s like, “Whatever, we’re not gonna die.” No, but I bet something else disastrous will happen. They take out this like…papier-mache heart that I at no point saw them buy or make, and they burn it on the ground. Then they make out.
Lola is making Bianca keep watch for her while she puts a random frog in Laura’s exotic building project. Seriously, last episode she just saw a frog hopping around Elite Way — even though we’ve never seen any kind of fauna around there before or since — and now she’s using to get revenge on her sister. Bianca freaks out that someone’s going to catch them, and of course the second she leaves her post to start crying to Lola about getting caught, Francisco walks in. They blow him off and leave, and he looks all suspicious. As if a junior would even care about freshman drama.
Sol whines to Tomás that her parents want her to finish school before she starts modeling full-time. Tomás is like, “Ugh, I know, we’re both too pretty to be here.” He proudly presents her with the math homework, but needles that he won’t give it to her unless she goes on a date with him. This is a lesson about the dangers of relying on men to do things for you because they’ll try to coerce sexual favors from you in exchange, but Sol does not recognize it.
Marizza presents her building project to the art teacher. Ah, it’s a “city of the future” project, and they’re supposed to be envisioning what the buildings will look like. Marizza hasn’t built anything, and tries to BS the teacher that in the future, all of our buildings will be like, on the Internet, man. The teacher’s like, “Oh, okay, then you get an A.” What? That worked? I see Elite Way has not raised their employment standards one bit. Then Laura presents her project, and when the teacher tests the moving roof, the frog jumps out. The teacher gets mad at Laura (like she really thinks Laura was being malicious), and Lujan excitedly offers to catch the frog. HEE! God, I love her.
Sonia’s deigned to show up to one of her own rehearsals, so she’s in the midst of dancing when Andres shows up like a creeper. My favorite thing about fictional rehearsals is just how the directors always cut them off in the middle of a scene or musical number like, “Oh no, no need to finish it, you got the first two minutes right and that’s ALL THAT MATTERS.” The theater director is just as bald and flamboyant as the last one, so I don’t actually know if this is the same guy or not. Either way, he is no longer critical of Sonia and now just spends his time telling her how awesome she is. Andres is like, “Omg, you ARE awesome, and I really want to get in your pants.” He tries once more to appeal to her better nature, and she sighs that she guesses she would be pretty upset if her kid disappeared. Empathy! She agrees to help him and Papa C, and Andres is like, “And I’m getting a date out of this too, right?”
Laura is in trouble for putting a frog in her building, and of course Dunoff doesn’t listen to her when she says she didn’t put it there. He’s like, “Do you see all this gray hair? CHILDREN GAVE ME THIS.” Hee! He says she has to apologize to the teacher, and they’re going to tell her parents. Honestly, everyone’s acting like it’s impossible for the frog to have hopped into her project, but it’s not like this school can successfully keep out juvenile deliquents, banned sex offenders, or random boyfriends, so wildlife shouldn’t be that surprising either.
Manuel and Mia have a picnic. They end up arguing a bit, and Mia starts crying that she’s afraid Manuel will leave her the way everyone in her life has (namely, Mama C). He’s like, “Don’t worry, I’ll only leave you if you don’t put out in the next 100 episodes.” They start talking about their parents’ problems, which segues into talking about kids — Manuel wants two and Mia wants six kids. Manuel appeases her and says they’ll have as many kids as she wants — they can have sixteen little Aguirre-Coluccis, running around bleating, “Aztec monkey! It’s so hard to be me!” Hee.
Then, bizarrely, after a commercial break, we cut back to Mia and Manuel looking ridiculously tan, like they’ve been stuck on that island for several days. Mia creepily tells Manuel that she feels awkward about sex because she still thinks of herself as a child, but she has the body of a woman now. Ew! I mean, the sentiment’s not wrong, but what weird way to phrase it, and what a weird thing to make a 16-year-old actress say. Maybe I’m just icked out because I had a book where a teenage girl tried to hit on a teacher by telling him she had the body of a woman, and now that particular wording just seems really gross to me. I don’t know. Anyway, Manuel doubles down on his creepiness all like, “Well, you’re not a child anymore, so we should have sex.” Mia admits she wants to, but intellectually she doesn’t feel ready: “My body’s saying do it, but my head’s saying no.” She’s like two words off from just quoting Christina Aguilera. Manuel tells her that it’s not silly for her to be afraid, and then they profess their love for each other and make out some more. He promises her that he’ll never make her do anything she doesn’t want to. LIES!
Vico catches Feli eating some of the candy, and Feli lies that she’s only eaten one chocolate. They start chatting about her secret admirer, and Pilar rolls in and pretends to be all interested in who Feli’s admirer is, too. OH, PILAR. Feli gushes about Francisco to her, which can only end well.
The supposedly-hot math teacher hands back everyone’s homework. Pablo BSes that he doesn’t feel well and runs to the nurse’s office, piquing Marizza’s suspicion. Meanwhile, Laura and Marcos have both gotten 10s on their homework, so the teacher wants to make them TAs. Laura and Marcos exchange smiles, which does not make Lujan happy at all. Meanwhile, Sol isn’t going on a date with Tomás anywhere, because she got a 1. Diego swoops in and is like, “I got a 9, what up girl.” Tomás seethes.
Sonia goes with Andres to some cafe, and she refuses to help him, and then she agrees. I dunno. Honestly, I kinda just zone out when she’s talking now.
Tomás goes to yell at Ana for screwing up his homework (then do your own homework next time, fool), and she derps that it can’t be. Drink! “I did everything perfectly, and then I gave the homework to Diego,” she says. Even Tomás can put two and two together and he storms off to kick Diego’s ass. Ana’s just like, “Whatever.”
Mia and Manuel decide it’s time to go back, but of course they discover the boat missing. Mia flips out, and Manuel’s like, “Hur dur I don’t remember if I tied the boat.” I mean, at least Mia is learning to be disappointed by men at an early age.
Some rando (“Ivan”) gives Marizza a present, saying he’s an Erreway fan. He’s like, “I really love those five songs you guys bust out one at a time.” Except the present is…not for her, it’s actually his T-shirt, and he wants her to sign it? That was weird. Pablo comes around the corner and sees Ivan getting all up in Marizza’s face — he tells her that in exchange for the autograph, he wants to take her out on a date. Uh, this whole thing feels very weighted in Ivan’s favor. And what’s with guys forcing girls to go on dates with them in this episode? Marizza shoots him down, and Ivan’s like, “I can’t believe she didn’t think she owes me a date for signing my shirt :(“
Marcos and Laura’s job as TAs apparently involves doing more homework, and Marcos is all leaning over Laura to show her which parts he’ll do and which parts she’ll do. Across the table in the not-library, Lujan fumes. She wriggles herself between them and generally acts super awkward and clingy and jealous. Marcos is like, “Oookay,” not picking up on her weird behavior at all.
Sonia flirts information about Mia and Manuel’s itinerary out of the travel agency. I’m confused. Did she not know where they were? Was Mia just like, “I’m going somewhere with my boyfriend and I’m not telling you where, can you lie to my father and my school, bye?” and Sonia was like, “Sure, no prob”?
Francisco confronts Lola and says that he won’t snitch on her, but she should confess and get Laura out of trouble. He puts a helpful hand on her shoulder, and Lola appears to consider it for half a second, then starts shrieking that he’s attacking her. Blas, never missing the opportunity to ingratiate himself to an underage girl, runs up to defend Lola. He’s all like, “The only person who gets to abuse girls around here is me!” And then, being Blas, he engages in some public humiliation and makes Francisco do push-ups on the cafeteria chairs.
God, I can’t wait for Blas to die. I’m gonna break out the wine and Trader Joe’s peanut butter cups for that episode.
Back on the island, Manuel went out searching for boats passing by, but didn’t find any. Mia freaks out that they’re stranded forever, and they’re going to have to live off of tropical fruit and eventually they’re going to go crazy and start worshiping a pig’s head on a stick. Manuel assures Mia that the bartender will want his boat back, and so he’ll come looking for them eventually. But back on the main island, the bartender’s like, “Ah, they’re young, they’re in love, I bet they’re spending the night on the island.”
The kids head off for gym class, except they’re getting on a bus, so it’s a…gym field trip? Marizza frets that she hasn’t been able to find Pablo all day. She overhears Guido telling Vico that Pablo’s not feeling well and is staying behind to rest, so Marizza fakes a sprained ankle to stay at school, too.
Andres calls Papa C to tell him that they’re making headway and Sonia is helping. Papa C’s like, “The fuck?” and Sonia’s like, “UGH, he’s such a STICK IN THE MUD.” Andres is like, “It’s hard being a single father after your wife ran away with another guy and died,” and Sonia’s like, “…I guess, but also…awkward.” Then they see that Mia and Manuel flew to Ecuador and realize they just have to check the hotels and they’ll find them. Like…every hotel in Ecuador? I feel like that might take more time than they’re anticipating.
Apparently Blas has taken the kids to a soccer field so they can play sports in a place that’s not their gym/tiny courtyard. I hate whenever I have to admit that Blas made a good decision. You’d think Elite Way would have their own soccer field, or they could’ve pretended this field was part of the campus. Anyway, the boys are playing while the girls sit out, and Vico’s all aflutter at watching the boys play without shirts. Oh, Vico.
After the game, Pilar pulls Francisco aside and tells him that she’s worried about Feli. “It’s hard for you, you know, ’cause she’s chubby and she thinks she’s ugly,” Pilar says. Jesus Christ, Pilar! She makes out like she’s all upset that she can’t convince Feli that she’s not ugly, and Francisco offers to talk to her. After all, being told that you’re pretty is so much more validating when it comes from a boy. He walks off and Pilar gets this look on her face like, “That was easy.” Honestly, I agree. If I were Francisco, I’d be like, “I don’t really know either of you, so…what the fuck.”
Laura chases a ball behind some bushes, and Lujan jumps her and tells her to stay way from Marcos. “Look, if you’re worried about your boyfriend, that’s not my fault,” Laura snaps. Dang! I mean, she’s not wrong, but it’s pretty confrontational from a character who’s been set up as a shy bookworm. Wait, was I expecting consistency from this show? Never mind.
Marizza finds Pablo emoing with his guitar in the art room. Honestly, I like when Marizza does nice things for other people and I love that she’s been less of a dick so far, but she’s giving way more than she’s getting, with respect to this whole “being friends with Pablo” thing. Pablo finally confesses that his mom has left the family and Marizza’s like, “That’s rough, buddy.” He cries that he feels like an idiot for not realizing. Marizza moves to comfort him, and their faces get reeeaal close. Pablo tries to kiss her, but Marizza says they’re both confused, and she’s afraid of getting hurt — and of hurting him. Fair enough.
Francisco goes to talk to Feli, and she immediately is like, “I hate P.E. because I’m fat and can’t run.” That’s…a little awkward. Francisco says weight shouldn’t matter — here in Buenos Aires, people are so obsessed with image and their ~aesthetic. “And it’s not like that in Santiago del Estero?” Feli asks. I don’t remember if they explicitly named that as where Francisco is from before, but now we know. He mentions that he used to have a slightly overweight girlfriend and tells Feli that he likes her — not like-likes her, but Feli gets all twitterpated anyway.
Later, everyone is hanging out on the field, not doing any exercise at all. Where the fuck is Blas? Feli spills all to Vico and Pilar, and gets all excited that Francisco is into chubby girls. Pilar’s like, “Maybe you’re reading too much into this?”, which is weird because you’d think she’d want to encourage Feli’s excitement, for maximum embarrassment. Some rando delivers another present to Feli, which appears to actually be from Francisco. Maybe. Where’d he get wrapping paper on a soccer field?
Andres invites Sonia into Casa Colucci, and she looks around like she’s never seen the place before, even though supposedly she’s tromped through it many a time while going to Papa C’s office. I mean, I know we’ve never seen this set before, but Sonia should have. Anyway, Andres gives Sonia a present and she’s like, “I can’t believe you’re friends with someone as BITTER and RUDE and UPTIGHT as Colucci, how could ANYONE like him, I can’t believe he even HAS friends, because he’s SO –” and Andres is just like, “ANYWAY, see you tomorrow.” He invites her to breakfast and she accepts, and maybe it’s just the upbeat pop-rock in the background, but I actually found it all kind of cute.
Night falls, and everyone goes back to school. Lujan rants to Marizza about Laura, but Marizza’s all wrapped up in Pablo’s problems. She confesses that she wanted to get back with Pablo, but she’s afraid he’ll just use her as a crutch and then dump her again. I mean…she’s not wrong. Lujan, for some reason, suggests making Pablo jealous to suss out his real feelings. Since when is Lujan an expert on relationships or even like…emotions in general? Anyway, she picked the perfect moment to suggest that, because just then Ivan rolls up and he’s like, “So, how about that date you owe me, even though you really don’t?” Marizza accepts. Love yourself, girl!
Mia and Manuel build a fire, and they decide that their love is more important than being freezing and stranded outside. I mean, if it makes them feel better, sure.
Dunoff is trying to study for his classes, and Gloria’s all pumped because he’s reading a bunch of the same scholars that she had to study, when she was getting a degree in education. She gushes about how much she loved the courses, before coming to Elite Way and getting disillusioned by the gritty world of high school politics and adolescent behavior. Dunoff realizes he can just cheat off of Gloria and her college notes. He’s all grateful that she would help him, and she puts her face super close to his and says she’d do anything for him. Yikes! And of course, Mama D walks in right at that moment.
Papa B comes to the school, and tells Pablo that Mama B is officially filing for divorce. She wants everything, presumably including custody of Pablo. Papa B says that since Pablo’s brothers are living somewhere that’s not here (seriously, sometimes I wonder whether Pablo’s brothers even exist), Pablo is the only one who can testify for Papa B against his mom. He’s super crafty about it, saying Pablo is either for Mama B, or for “us”, read: him and Pablo as a team. Oh, he is sneaky.
Mia wakes up on the beach and freaks out that she can’t find Manuel. Maybe the sea lion who didn’t get Mia came back seeking its revenge and ate him.
Leave a Reply