There’s no opening monologue in this episode either, which makes me wonder if we’ve just done away with them entirely. Shit. How am I going to fill up this space now?
Manuel and Nico are reading Mia’s diary. Manuel’s like, “Oh shit, read this! Mia has an impossible love!” Nico’s like, “Aw yes, tell me all the gossip!” Hee. Manuel reads about how at some unspecified date a while ago, some guy with dark hair come to the school, and he’s so arrogant and powerful but everyone’s in love with him, but he won’t look at Mia twice. Who could it be?! “OBVIOUSLY, she likes Blas,” Manuel says. Oh my God, Manuel. Nico calls Mia’s writing cheesy. Aw, don’t be mean, Nico. Also, I thought “Pretty Boy” moved Feli to tears and shit. Maybe we’re not supposed to trust Feli’s taste. Anyway, Nico’s like, “Why are we even reading her diary? Why are you so obsessed with Mia?” Manuel’s like, “How dare, this is important research for my revenge!” Nico’s like nah man, you’re so into her. Manuel’s all offended at the very suggestion.
Pablo goes to see Paula. He’s brought her balloons and she’s all twitterpated by how thoughtful he is. They make out, profess their love for each other, blah blah blah. I think they’ve known each other for a full 28 hours now? Maybe 30. She invites him into her apartment for attempt 2 at deflowering him.
Tomás and Guido perv on Lulu in the teachers’ lounge, since they don’t have anything to do now that the final exam prank plot’s been concluded. They cry that they simply can’t bear not being in dance group anymore, and try to hit her up for some ~private lessons~. Lulu’s gotten slightly smarter than she was the last time we saw her, because she’s not falling for that. Tomás in particular hams it up, and Guido’s like, “Dang, you’re the only one without a love interest, I’ll be generous and let you have a shot with Lulu.” Guido is defining “love interest” loosely, I see. Tomás wails that he misses dancing. “Just start your own dance group and stop piggybacking off the girls’ work,” Lulu doesn’t say. She makes him a cup of tea (from Tomás’s face, I think it’s supposed to be gross, but he plays it off like it’s good, heh) and he cries to her that dance group was so important to him because he doesn’t have any friends, and his family all hates him, and oh, he’s SO ALONE. “My mom never hugs me!” he wails. Oh my God, Tomás. Lulu awkwardly hugs him, and rolls her eyes at Mansilla when he walks in on them. Ha!
Casa Colucci. Mia corners Peter and interrogates him about Papa and Mercedes. Specifically, she wants to know about the moment Papa C ran off with Mama C. Peter’s like, “Oh, I remember every second of it! They met at an event –” “What was my mom doing?” Mia wants to know. “Was she a model?” Oh, wait, Peter remembers everything except what Mama C’s job was and how exactly she ran off with Papa C. But they were super in love, and that’s all Mia needs to know! Mia is understandably not too happy with this. She lapses into a daydream where Manuel dances around with a mannequin which eventually turns into Mia. I guess he’s supposed to be Papa C and Mia’s Mama C? It’s pretty stupid, and not even in a fun way like the other dream sequences. Let’s move on.
The padres Dunoff go for a walk in some park while Dunoff tells Mama D about his attempt to kick Joaquin out. He’s like, “But if we kick Joaquin out, we can’t participate in his uncle’s shady money-laundering business anymore. WHAT DO.” Mama D’s like, “Por qué no los dos?” Dunoff tells her they can’t kick him out AND keep the money; ergo, they must make the difficult decision between illegal moneygetting activities and their only child. They sit there like dang…this is a rough choice. Dunoff, showing some semblance of a conscience, wants to know why Mama D doesn’t get a job, if she loves money so much. Mama D’s like, “Don’t be silly.” I should add at least a few summaries of this show said that Mama D was an English teacher at Elite Way. I don’t know if that development comes later or if someone got mixed up along the way, because I have not ever seen her do anything remotely close to teaching within the past 60 episodes.
Lounge. Marcos catches Nico, Lujan, and Manuel up on his infiltration plans, and Lujan’s all twitterpated by his new ~rebeldía. He’s also dressing way less dorky. Dig the denim jacket! I kind of miss his sweater vests, though 🙁
A student walks by and slips Marcos a note telling him to meet one of their members on the front lawn, alone. For some reason, they’re all like, “Omg, they’re not going to let all the scholarship students tag along to your intro meeting? This must mean you’re in DANGER!” They all immediately start discouraging him from going, but Marcos says he has to do it for Marizza. Lujan is sad.
Casa Colucci. Feli comes to see Mia, and Mia’s all pissy that Feli’s late. Feli’s like, “Sorry, my controlling boyfriend wouldn’t let me go.” Mia wails that no one’s been giving her attention; Feli showed up late and Papa C is ignoring her. But she’s still already packing for their trip — I think she mentions the tickets are for New York? Mia spaces out, and has a moment with this shitty Photoshopped hallucination of Manuel:
She comes back to reality and chirps to Feli that she’s so excited for the trip; she can’t wait to go off with Papa C and leave Mercedes in the dust. She also vows to figure out what Peter wasn’t telling her about Mama C, and Feli promises to help, because it’s not like she has anything else going on.
Nico and Manuel agree to follow Marcos to his meeting and make sure the Society doesn’t stab him or anything. Sure, that won’t give Marcos away to the Society AT ALL. They’re interrupted, though, by the return of Luna. She and Nico are all sappy with each other, which I mock but it is actually kind of cute. It’s nice that they seem to actually like each other, and are generally only kept apart by outside forces instead of their own dumbassery.
Pablo’s room. Tomás is all like, “Lulu gave me tea, we’re basically in love.” His sad story of being friendless and alone apparently induced Lulu to invite him out to grab coffee or something, so off he goes. “Not with those shoes you’re not,” Guido, suddenly random fashionista, observes. He pouts that he’s the only one not getting anywhere with his girl of choice, and Tomás is like, “Just act really pathetic and cry all over her, it worked for me.” Heh.
Back in the teachers’ lounge, Mansilla questions Lulu’s wisdom re: taking a student out for a drink. Lulu says they’re only going for a walk, and she’s just helping out a student like Mansilla’s always doing. Tomás is sad! He has no friends! Mansilla’s like, “Have you just like…not noticed that he’s always hanging out with Pablo?” Lulu’s pissed that he’s casting doubt on her educator skillz, and Mansilla suggests they grab coffee sometime and talk their issues out. Lulu’s like, “No, and now if you’ll excuse me, I have my not at all inappropriate date with a student to go on.”
Dunoff calls Pilar into his office and tells her that he’s going to be a good parent and expel Joaquin and Vico for besmirching Pilar’s honor. Pilar’s like, “Omg, how EMBARRASSING” and wails that if Dunoff does that, the entire school will know it’s because of Pilar and she’ll never live it down. Fair enough, actually, especially as everyone already thinks she’s a snitch. Dunoff’s like, “Dang, I do not get this parenting or principaling thing at ALL.”
“Nothing makes sense!”
Mia’s rooting around Papa C’s office, looking for more clues about Mama C. Feli comes in whining that she got bored keeping watch for Mia. Heh. Mia says she can’t find any of Mama C’s stuff, and wonders if Papa C threw it all out. Yes? He did? And all the stuff that was left, Peter hid and gave to Mia? Shouldn’t Mia know this? Anyway, Papa C and Mercedes come in. Good job, Feli. Mia is rude to Mercedes, and Papa C tells her to back off. Mercedes suggests that she and Mia give being friends a shot, seeing as they got along well when Mercedes was pretending to be someone else. “That’s true,” Feli says. Mia: “Shut up, Feli.” Heh. Mia snaps that her friends don’t have to lie to get close to her. Ooh, burn. Papa C takes Mercedes side, which…like, I get that Mia’s supposed to be spoiled and in need of some humility, and she is being rude, but it’s wild how they’re all ~SO SHOCKED~ that she’s pissed about being lied to. Especially by people who are supposed to be the adults in her life. Papa C and Mercedes storm off, and Mia grumps that Mercedes just wants to use her to get close to Papa C. “Maybe you can use her,” Feli suggests. After all, if Papa C dumped Mercedes for Mama C, then Mercedes probably knew Mama C. Mia’s like, “A brilliant idea!”
Manuel hella obviously huddles behind some columns and watches Marcos wait on the lawn. Some guy rolls up to him and they chat a bit, then some guys come up to talk to Manuel. When they leave and Manuel looks back, Marcos is gone! Manuel’s not a very good spy. He was like, literally just right there. The Society guy is still chilling on the lawn, though, so Manuel goes up and starts yelling at him, and the guy’s all like, “You don’t own this spot! I’ll break your face!” I feel like maybe both of them need to chill.
Back to Pablo and Paula. Pablo’s telling her about how he’s liked girls at school, but he’s never been ~in love. Well, maybe with this one really mouthy dramatic girl, but she’s on vacation for like a month. He’ll never see her again! “I don’t know if I’m in love with her, or if I want to be like her,” he tells Paula. He waxes on about how rebelde Marizza is, and how she’s always willing to mess with Papa B. Paula’s like, “Yeah, your dad’s kind of a dick.” Pablo’s like, “Wait, you know him?” Paula covers and says no, but that’s the vibe she gets from his public image. She asks if he’s nervous about sex because of Papa B, and Pablo’s like, “I mean, he IS really weird about my virginity.”
Lulu and Tomás troll around the park. She tries to help him out, Mansilla-style. “You like painting, right?” she asks. “Why don’t you invite your friends around and show them how?” Since when? I can’t tell if Tomás just made that up, or if that’s a character trait they’ve just added. It came so out of left field I had to rewatch the scene to make sure I heard correctly. “But Lulu, I don’t have friends, remember?” Tomás says. Hee. He’s laying it on so thick. Tomás tries to crawl into Lulu’s lap, then Mansilla shows up to cockblock them. “Let’s walk together! Isn’t this a nice park?” he says. Ha!
Lounge. Nico’s all like, “Yo, so my scheming girlfriend told me you’re letting Matías put the mack on,” but he’s appeased when Luna says she doesn’t like him. He asked for her number, but she didn’t give it to him. Except then Matías calls her. Scare chord! Nico is all pissed that Luna lied, and Luna’s like, “Hey, this is 2002, people still have phone books.” Just kidding. She gets snippy that Nico doesn’t believe her, and snaps that she doesn’t lie to him. An excellent time for Tatiana to show up! She invites Nico out for a drink, and he passive-aggressively accepts. “Luna, do you want to come with?” Tatiana asks. Heh. Well played. Also, I like how this comes right after I complimented Luna and Nico on not being complete dumbasses. Please scratch that above comment.
Manuel flips out on Julieta about Marcos going missing, and Julieta tells him all they can do is wait for Marcos to come back. She tells Manuel that he doesn’t know what he got himself — and Marcos — into, and Manuel asks if she thinks Marcos is in real danger. “Yes,” Julieta says. Jesus Christ, Julieta, they’re not the Klan.
Mia’s room. Mercedes comes in and Mia starts giving a haughty speech about how she feels really bad for Mercedes, getting dumped for Mia’s flawless mom and everything. It must be HELLA embarrassing to know that Papa C’s only back together with her because Mama C’s dead. “Their love is eternal,” Mia says. “Well, of course you believe in eternal love; you’re still a baby,” Mercedes tells her. “I don’t think you’re ready for the ugly truth about your parents.” And the claws are out! Mercedes gets up in Mia’s face and creepily tells her that Mama C was from a lower class than Papa C (I thought Mia knew this?), and she was addicted to drugs and was an alcoholic. Mia bursts into tears, and Mercedes snips that Mia had to grow up sometime.
The school basement. The Society’s vetting Marcos’s commitment to Sparkle Motion, and he’s like, “Oh yeah, I totally want to get rid of the scholarship students. TOTALLY.” He’s so committed that he shares a room with Manuel, just to spy on him! The Society is appeased, but they echo that THEY’LL BE WATCHING HIM.
Back in Mia’s room, Mercedes is gone and Feli’s come back to comfort Mia. Mia cries that she doesn’t understand how she came from a mom like hers. I don’t know what it says about me or the people I hang out with, but this scene strikes me as weird because I just can’t see this being earth-shattering news for anyone I know. Well, I guess it makes sense for Mia and her ideas about class and family, but I’m just here like, “Whatever, it’s not like Mama C killed someone.” Anyway, Mia swears Feli to secrecy, and then Augusto shows up. Frickin’ Augusto. He’s like, “Oh hey, I thought I could hang with you and your grieving best friend because I’m weird and controlling :)” Now we KNOW something is up with Augusto, because what adult would ever want to hang out with two 15-year-olds, honestly.
Joaquin gives Pilar a rose and swears that he loves only her; he’s just incredibly weak-willed when faced with Vico’s vagina, like all boys in this school. Pilar shows a bit of spine and says she doesn’t trust him anymore, but Joaquin cries that his uncle’s going to send him to military school or some shit if Joaquin gets kicked out of Elite Way, and he’s definitely going to get his ass kicked in military school. He begs Pilar to give him another chance. He promises not to cheat on her this time! Pilar agrees, but tells him it’s the last chance. Oh, Pilar. You were almost cool there.
The awkward Lulu/Tomás/Mansilla threesome returns to school. Tomás is like, “I had so much fun, let’s do this again because I’m so lonely and unloved, ya know :)” Mansilla’s not impressed by this. After Tomás leaves, he’s like, “Dude, Dunoff’s gonna kill you, only Blas is allowed to creep on the underage schoolchildren.” Lulu snaps that she can’t stand Mansilla and she wants him to leave her alone. Nice try, Lulu, but the guys on this show can’t take “no” for an answer.
Marcos spills the details about his meeting with the Society to Manuel and Lujan, in broad daylight. Lujan tells him that she told Marizza about what he did, and “Marizza” already replied. She forks over the “email”, and Marcos is like, “Hold up, I’m a nerd and I’m noticing that there’s no email address on this.” If he’s such a nerd, how come he didn’t notice he was opening the email up in Word last time? Lujan BSes about how Marizza’s email address has to be kept secret on account of Papa Spirito being controlling or whatever, and anyway, Marcos can just tell Lujan what he wants to say and she’ll write to Marizza for him. Not weird at all! Marcos leaves, and Manuel’s kind of like, “Something weird is going on here.”
Pablo leaves Paula’s apartment, again without getting laid. Papa B calls and Paula has to give him the brush-off again. Why don’t they just lie and say they did the deed? It’s not like they can check Pablo’s dick for evidence.
Peter comes to see Papa C in his office and says he overheard Mercedes and Mia arguing, and he’s afraid Mercedes upset Mia. Papa C’s like, “Impossible, the hurt party here is Mercedes!” Papa C’s so dickmatized. Then Mia storms in all, “Why didn’t you tell me my mom was on hella drugs!” Cliffhanger!
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