Previously on Rebelde Way: Lujan is projecting her desires for family onto a comatose Blas, who also now might be dying. Fingers crossed!
Just kidding, let’s not pick up at that extremely tense and dramatic moment. Instead, let us cut over to Guido’s dick problems! This run of episodes is pretty rough, I think because they’re all focused on the most inane characters (Guido, Feli, Sol). Nobody cares about any of them!
Anyway, after trying to pressure Agustina into having sex, she’s now yelling at him to get out and not letting him get within five feet of her, which is a completely understandable reaction to being seduced by Guido. Guido begs her to stop crying and tells her that she’s just “misunderstood all of this.” I hate him SO MUCH. Agustina keeps asking him to call her dad, but Guido refuses because obviously, making his 14-year-old girlfriend feel safe is less important to him than her dad’s money. I hate him SO MUCH (x2). He calls the school instead, hoping to get Lola. Out of all the random kids who could pick up the phone in the hallway? I don’t know. He gets Laura instead and he’s like, “Close enough.” Lola has gone off with Mrs. Arregui, so Guido asks Laura to help him instead.
Over at the hospital, Miranda and Lujan are sitting outside in the hallway. Miranda pats her shoulder awkwardly, and ooh, you can see that he’s got a ring on his left hand. RIP to Michi’s dreams.
At Casa Colucci, Papa C receives Mia’s credit card bill and starts ranting about how much money it is and how on earth is he going to pay for it, blah blah obvious setup blah. Sonia tries to tell him that she has good news, and Papa C glares that he hopes he’s not going to say that she’s going back to work to help pay the bills, because that is not good news! He scowls that he doesn’t want Sonia to go back to having her goodies ogled, as Eliza Dushku would say, by hundreds of dudes. Sonia’s like, “Wow, what a specific scenario for you to be against.” She lies and tells him that her good news is that she returned the expensive silverware she bought for the house, and she’s giving the check to Papa C, since it was his money. Papa C’s like, “You’re so cute when you’re obeying me and letting me control your finances!”
Fernanda and Pilar do a bit of modeling and the photographer compliments them on their natural ability. “You’re better than most professionals!” he gushes. Almost like the actresses are professional models themselves! He adds that, unfortunately, there’s some issue with their payment, so they won’t be getting paid for at least another few days. Wow, screwing models out of their payment is the unintentionally the most realistic plot that this show has done. The photographer tells them that their photos will be on some posters at the mall, and Pilar has another meltdown over the thought of Tomás or her dad finding out about her modeling career. Fernanda points out that it’s not likely that Tomás or Dunoff are going to be waltzing into a women’s clothing store at the mall, which calms Pilar down, although I’m sure Tomás and/or Dunoff is going to suddenly wind up going shopping, just for the drama.
Just then, the doorbell rings, and Maxi and Sol announce their presence. Fernanda and Pilar scramble to hide, while Maxi and Sol come in. Maxi demands that the photographer redo the shoot with Sol as the model, to which the photographer obviously refuses. Maxi starts ranting that he is the owner’s nephew and he’ll make sure the photographer never works again! The photographer stands his ground and Maxi and Sol storm off, Sol apparently not realizing that she’s tanking her future career by pissing off a photographer who’s much more established in the fashion industry than she is.
Back at the hospital, Miranda says that he’s figured out that, underneath the facial wounds and hospital bandages, it’s Blas who was injured. Lujan asks him not to tell anyone, and Miranda says he’ll only keep his trap shut if she gives him a good reason. Lujan’s like, “He’ll die of embarrassment if everyone finds out he was in a coma!” It’s bold of Lujan to assume that Blas will die of embarrassment instead of taking his anger out on her and all the other students in the vicinity the way that he always does. She still won’t tell Miranda what’s going on, though, and they’re interrupted by the nurses wheeling some of the machinery out of Blas’s room.
And then, weirdly, we cut to a terrible VHS-quality performance from one of Erreway’s IRL concerts, and Luisana Lopilato appears to be wearing underwear over her jumpsuit like a bizarro version of Batman. I won’t pretend to understand this.
After that interlude, we get back to Miranda and Lujan. The doctor leaves Blas’s room and tells Lujan that he had a slight bout of cardiorespiratory failure, but no worries, it lasted like five minutes and he’s all better now. Look, dudes, I know Blas dies, there is no reason to be stringing out for this long. The doctor adds that Blas is still in the same condition he was in before, but Lujan excitedly tells him that she and Miranda were arguing earlier, and she saw Blas twitch like he was going to get up and defend her. Because that’s what Blas does, defend his students from harm! I just — I really don’t know if I’m meant to be like, “Omg, now that Blas is in a coma, I too remember him as a protector of the innocent!” or if I’m meant to think that Lujan is just getting her deep-seated trauma all over everyone in this hospital. The doctor tries to explain to her that Blas is nonresponsive, and Lujan tells him, “Think whatever you want!” Lujan, he…he’s got an actual medical degree, you know that, right?
Aaand Javier is back. Gross. He shows up at school with his friend with the really strong eyebrows, whom we haven’t seen in many moons. Hi, Eyebrow Friend! His friend brings up that Javier doesn’t seem to be in a very good mood, which is an opportunity for Javier to segue into talking about Marizza. Oh my God, nobody cares. Javier goes on about how he’s done so much for Marizza, and yet she betrayed him by going on tour with Erreway. What? I mean, I think Erreway’s musical career is as dumb as the next person, but who tf is going to pass up the opportunity for a nationwide tour in favor of hanging out with Javier? Eyebrow Friend tells him that he’s just gotta get over it and focus on the stuff that makes him happy. Javier’s like, “But I have no personality or interests outside of stalking Marizza!” Eyebrow Friend offers to lend Javier his skateboard to lift his spirits, but Javier’s like, “Skateboarding won’t make me feel better, only revenge will do that!” HEE!
Apparently Javier’s master plan is to get revenge by hurting Marizza’s best friend, Lujan. Eyebrow Friend is like, “That’s kind of harsh, she doesn’t have anything to do with this.” Javier’s like, “Hurting her best friend will teach her that what she does to me, I’ll do right back to her.” Is…he saying that Marizza hurt his best friend? Is he unintentionally admitting his narcissism by saying that his best friend is himself? I don’t know. Eyebrow Friend just shrugs because I guess they didn’t feel like writing more dialogue for him.
Miranda tells Lujan that he’ll excuse her absences for as long as she needs to deal with Blas’s coma. So I guess she’ll just…chill in her room until she’s over it? They should really think about setting up a different wing for grieving students. Sharing a room with Marizza can’t be good for anyone’s trauma processing. Anyway, the doctor comes back and says that Lujan can go in to see Blas. After she goes inside, Miranda asks the doctor if there’s any chance that Blas will wake up. “It’s absolutely impossible,” the doctor says. “That blonde girl is totally deluded,” he doesn’t add.
The next day. In the hall, Guido is telling Francisco and Tomás about his failure to get into Agustina’s pants. He blames Tomás for giving him faulty instructions, showing once again an inability to take responsibility for his own actions. How has it been 250 episodes and Guido has shown zero growth? Fernanda has had more of a character arc than he has. Anyway, he asks Laura and Lola where Agustina is, and they tell him that she felt sick and went home. Guido panics that Agustina is in her house with Nicolas Cage right now, telling him that Guido tried to assault her.
Fernanda and Pilar tell Feli what Maxi and Sol are up to. Feli’s like, “Well, who cares if Sol likes Maxi? That just means I can be with Lalo with no interference!” Fernanda’s like, “Were you even listening? Sol promised Maxi that if he helps her, you’ll get back together with him.” Feli doesn’t get a chance to react to this, though, because she suddenly says that she feels queasy and gets up to leave. Laura comes in and sees Fernanda and Pilar fussing over Feli, and when Pilar tells her that Feli doesn’t feel well, Laura’s like, “Ohhh boy.” She offers to take care of Feli and hustles her off.
Sol waltzes in, and Pilar also leaves so that Fernanda can get more information out of her. Sol tells Fernanda that Maxi got her the modelling job after all, which Fernanda is not at all pleased to hear.
In the bathroom, Laura splashes some water on Feli’s face. Pilar comes in and asks if Feli got sick because of what Pilar told her about Maxi (lol). Feli starts BSing that it’s nothing, but Laura cuts in and says that she totally found Feli’s unused pad on the counter, so clearly something is up. Feli starts crying and says that she thinks she’s pregnant, and she’s not ready to have a baby and she’s all alone in the universe. Laura and Pilar quickly assure her that they’re here for her, which is very sweet.
Marcos goes to the teachers’ lounge to ask Miranda where Lujan is. He’s like, “I don’t know if you know who Lujan Linares is, but I was wondering why she was absent?” “You’re the only class I teach and there’s only about twenty of you, plus I spent all of yesterday watching her try to fight a doctor,” Miranda doesn’t say. Instead, he tells Marcos that Lujan is in the hospital with Blas. He wants to know why Lujan is so worried about Blas, and Marcos starts spluttering and obviously lying that he has no idea. Miranda raises an eyebrow and asks if Marcos is covering up a romantic relationship between Lujan and Blas, and Marcos is like, “Ew, gross, they would never!” I mean…Blas definitely would, Marcos. Marcos insists that Lujan and Blas hate each other, to which Miranda’s like, “Interesting.”
In the hallway, Feli’s melting down more over the possibility of being pregnant. After far too much hemming and hawing, Pilar finally hits on the idea of buying a pregnancy test. She and Laura offer to sneak out during free period to buy one for Feli, and they have a group hug.
Then they go off to class, and Guido intercepts Laura on the way. He asks if she knows if Agustina has told her dad what happened, and Laura’s like, “If you’re in trouble, that’s not my problem.” HEE! Michi comes up and tells Guido that Agustina’s dad is here to see him, and Guido begs Laura to help him. He says that he’ll owe her whatever favor she wants, and Laura’s like, “Whatever I want? Okay, let’s go.” Heh.
Over in the teachers’ lounge, Marcos has finished telling Miranda all about Lujan and Blas’s sordid history. Miranda’s like, “Wow, it sounds like he infiltrated this school solely to harass Lujan and creep on the rest of the underage girls, and that’s pretty fucked up.” THANK YOU, MIRANDA. Marcos also reveals that Blas is Lujan’s guardian, although he adds that it must not matter now, since Blas is almost dead? Hee. Miranda says that Lujan is in deep denial over what’s happening, so they should probably help her before Blas actually dies and sends her into a permanent tailspin. He thanks Marcos and leaves, and Marcos smiles after him, perhaps having not yet realized that Lujan is going to murder him when she finds out about this.
Guido makes Laura go talk to Agustina’s dad for him because he is a punk-ass baby. Laura comes out and says that Nicolas Cage just wants Guido to call him, and Guido is so relieved that he kisses Laura. No, Laura! Run! No good ever comes of hooking up with Guido!!!
The photographer calls Fernanda and Pilar. They’re initially mad at him, but he explains that he’s not using Sol in the campaign after all, and Fernanda and Pilar are still the models. He says he can come by to give them their paychecks, and Fernanda arranges for them to meet during their free period. Pilar sweatdrops and says that she’s busy during free period.
Lujan goes to visit Blas again and tells him that she doesn’t care what logic and science says, she knows that he was trying to defend her from Miranda — but he doesn’t need to, because he knows perfectly well that she can defend herself. He knows that from…all the times he tried to choke her or throw her to the ground? Anyway, Miranda shows up and tells Lujan that he knows all about her sordid history with Blas and how Blas infiltrated Elite Way to stalk her. Lujan’s like, “No, being at school pained him, but he did it for me! He worked at Elite Way so he could help me! He abused me to make me strong!” Yikes!!! Someone please get this girl some therapy!!! Miranda gently tries to break it to her that Blas isn’t going to wake up, and Lujan starts bleating that he can’t die, presumably because he has split his soul into Horcruxes or something. Lujan breaks down and admits that she blames herself for what happened, and if Blas dies, then she’ll feel like his death is her fault. I’d love to be responsible for Blas dying, but I guess poor Lujan is too emotionally messed up to see it that way.
Feli cries more to Laura about being pregnant. Pilar comes up and tries to comfort Feli by saying that it might be a false alarm — after all, that’s what happened to her that time she slept with Joaquin! Wow, I can’t believe we’re acknowledging things that happened in season one. No mention of how Luna emotionally supported her through that, though. Feli and Laura are like “WHAT” but Pilar’s like, “Never mind, no time to go over stuff that happened last season.” Laura starts going off on Feli for not using a condom, and she’s like, “You might not just be pregnant, you could have chlamydia! Or HIV! Or both!” Pilar’s like, “Wow, you are not helping.” Feli cries that she wants to see Lalo.
Sonia has “rehearsal” with Sammy, which mostly consists of her spinning around while music plays. Everyone who pays for a Sonia Rey show is getting scammed. Papa C calls and tells her to turn on the TV, because Papa B is giving an interview. Papa B denies having anything to do with Elite Way, and he especially denies using the school to launder money through. Sonia doesn’t have a TV in her rehearsal room, so she just mumbles about how awful it all is, and Papa C is suspicious.
Laura and Pilar eventually come up with a plan to help Feli see Lalo, because God knows Feli hasn’t put in the slightest effort to come up with a plan on her own, preferring to sit on the floor and cry instead. Even as they’re walking out of the school, Feli is wailing that their plan won’t work like the wet rag that she is. She pretends to be on the phone with her dad, and hands the phone over to her bodyguards so that they can confirm that Feli’s allowed to leave the school. It’s actually Guido on the other end of the line, who manages to fool the bodyguard into letting Feli go.
Tomás is with Guido, and he muses that it’s weird that Pilar was just hanging out with Fernanda, and now she’s hanging out with Feli and Laura. Heh. What, Pilar can’t have multiple friends? Guido’s like, “Yeah, she’s probably cheating on you.” Tomás immediately panics and decides that he has to go stalk Pilar now, and Guido’s like, “Wait, you have to stay with me for when I talk to Nicolas Cage! He’s gonna hurt me!”
Miranda brings Lujan back to school. Javier immediately intercepts them and notices that Lujan seems down. He’s like, “Is it something to do with Marizza?!” and Lujan’s like, “No, not everything is about Marizza.” She starts sniffling, so Javier hugs her, and it’s super gross. Nobody should ever want to be that close to Javier. Naturally, Marcos turns the corner at that moment and snaps, “EXCUSE?” Hee. Javier skedaddles, and Lujan snipes at Marcos for telling Miranda about Blas being her guardian. Marcos is like, “Damn, I had to, he thought you two were banging!” Lujan tells Marcos to stop helping her, because she doesn’t need him. Javier leans back from around the corner and smiles evilly.
Mama D comes by the office and tells Dunoff and Michi that what Papa B said on television was not good at all. If Elite Way is caught in a money laundering scheme, they’ll close the school! Honestly, that can only be a good thing for the collective youth of Buenos Aires. Michi says that everything is in order, right here in their binder of expenses! Dunoff takes the binder and tells Michi to go away, and then he and Mama D promptly have a mutual nervous breakdown over the checks that Dunoff signed for Papa B.
Maxi tells Sol that the campaign with the photographer fell through after all; Sol just didn’t fit the brand’s image and it’s not a big deal. Sol wibbles at him that modelling is her dream — or presumably being validated for her looks is, since models do not actually get paid that much. Maxi sighs that Sol really does have it rough, what with her modelling dreams being crushed and also her unrequited love for Maxi. Sol’s like, “Say what?” because she apparently keeps forgetting that part of her master plan involves stringing Maxi along. Oh, Sol. You’ve got to be more detail-oriented if you want your evil plans to work.
Maxi reminds her that he still likes Feli, and Sol says that he’ll never win her back now, since he failed to get Sol the modelling job. She adds that, nevertheless, she thinks there might be something else he can do to impress Feli. Maxi says that he won’t talk to his aunt again, as his aunt was like, “That blonde girl is clearly using you, my dude.” Heh. Sol denies it and suggests that Maxi ask his dad to give her a modelling opportunity for one of his many companies. It would be hilarious if Maxi’s dad only owned boring-ass finance companies and Sol becomes one of those stock photo models that does stuff like wearing pantsuits and jumping in conference rooms.
A mom and her baby conveniently happen to be shopping at Lalo’s kiosk, so we can see him coo over the baby and the show can drop some anvils about how good he is with kids. Feli, Laura, and Pilar come by, and Laura and Pilar needle Feli to TELL LALO about the THING they’ll be buying, which they will come back to SHOW Feli. Lalo’s like, “Say what?” and Feli admits to him that she thinks she’s pregnant. She starts melting down while Lalo’s like, “Well, hey, it’s not that bad!” Yeah, getting pregnant in high school in a country where abortion is illegal is totally fine! She’ll just have to carry the baby to term, give birth, and then raise it, no big deal. Even if she were to give the baby up for adoption, that’s at least a few months of school she’d miss — enough that she’d probably have to repeat the year — not to mention the physical, financial, and social strain she’d be under.
Lalo reassures Feli that he would love to have a baby with her, and dramatic music plays in the background while they hug. We fade in to Erreway giving a speech about fighting for your heart to a crowd of teenagers. That’s nice and all, and I guess it solves the problem of Feli being a single mother, but it’s still very…I mean, I read a lot of “teen pregnancy” fanfiction in middle school, because “peak romantic love” to twelve-year-olds is usually either stalking (read: Twilight) or a nuclear family, and I wasn’t old enough to realize that two characters declaring their love for each other at 16 and then running off to start of family rarely ends well in real life.
Then we spend the next few minutes cutting back and forth between Lujan lying in bed being emo and some more VHS-quality footage of the Erreway concert. Shout-out to all the teens in the audience holding literal video cameras! Lujan eventually gets up and picks up a photo of her and Marizza, and bitters that Marizza is never around when Lujan really needs her. Damn, are you saying that Marizza only cares about herself and doesn’t provide that much support to her other friends? Because you would be…kind of right.
Tomás follows Pilar and sees her buying a pregnancy test at the pharmacy. He immediately assumes that she’s been cheating on him and has gotten pregnant.
Just kidding, I wrote that above sentence before I even watched the scene, but it’s actually pretty close: Laura and Pilar go to the pharmacy, and Laura immediately starts dying of embarrassment over even saying the words “pregnancy test”, so Pilar has to woman up and buy it herself. She claims to the cashier that it’s for her friend, and he’s like, “That’s what they all say.” Nevertheless, he’s willing to sell it to her, but not before he gives her a disclaimer that the test isn’t 100% certain. Tomás gets there on time to hear this part, but misses the part where Pilar says the test isn’t for herself, naturally.
The doctor goes to the other side of the store to get the test, and Tomás intercepts him. He says that Pilar is his girlfriend, and the doctor snarks that Tomás and Pilar should’ve been more careful. It takes a moment for this to get through poor dumb Tomás’s head, but when he gets it, he’s not at all happy.
And then Dunoff shows up! Okay, that was not a twist I was expecting from this scene.
Back at school, Javier comes by Lujan’s room. She reminds him that boys aren’t allowed in the girls’ dorms, and Javier’s like, “Yeah, but I’ve snuck in here to steal Marizza’s diary like ten times already, so whatever.” With no preamble — like, they cut away and then they cut back and I don’t know how they got on this topic at all — Javier tells Lujan that Elite Way might close because of Papa B’s dirty dealings, and also he knows Blas is dying. Love when they just sort of dump exposition out there without trying to plausibly set it up first! Lujan admits that the Blas thing is true, at least, and breaks down crying. Javier hugs her and smiles evilly over her shoulder, because I guess he’s going to use Blas’s death to his advantage…somehow? I don’t expect that much from Javier’s plans at this point, honestly.
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