Opening monologue: We have to risk things for our friends, because without a lunch table to sit at, we are living in an ETERNAL NIGHT.
So Marizza was crying over Pablo leaving. Then she got over it in about two seconds. She’s back to her usual self now, storming into the sad trailer and demanding that Paula tell Pablo about her seedy past with Papa B. Paula immediately starts yelling that Marizza’s trying to break them up, which isn’t suspicious at all. Then she jumps on Marizza and starts trying to tear her hair out. I mean, I can’t fault her for thinking Pablo will like her better if she acts more like Marizza. Pablo pulls Paula off and Marizza gets distracted by a call from Facundo. He’s like, “I let you dick me around and you stood me up, what gives?” Marizza snaps that him that she’s busy, but he’s like, “No, we’re going to do this now!” Marizza’s like, “Shut up, you’re barely a recurring character,” and hangs up on him, but in the meantime, Pablo and Paula have escaped.
Marcos heads back to his room to find Nico hanging out and Manuel gone. “He’s studying,” Nico says. “Studying? That’s weird,” Marcos says. Hee. It is pretty weird when anyone in this school studies, instead of tracking down an ex-teacher and trying to revive a septuagenarian romance to avoid homework. Marcos notes that Nico’s looking pretty emo (his hair’s all un-gelled again! Truly tragic), and Nico complains that Luna would rather hang out with Pilar than him. Thankfully, Lujan and her fists of fury storm in and cut off his whine fest. Nico tells her that Blas is doing rounds, and Lujan snaps that she doesn’t care, she’s going to beat up Marcos now and Blas can go fuck himself. God, I love her.
Nico runs outside and Blas sees him. He’s like, “Why are you hanging around outside your room with your shirt unbuttoned?” Now, see, if Nico was halfway useful, he could come up with something better than, “Uh…I don’t know. Oh, studying! They’re totally studying in there!” But he’s not, so he doesn’t. Blas walks in on Lujan on top of Marcos, punching him. He pulls her off, and Lujan…buttons her shirt back up? Dude. Anyway, Blas yells at her that there will be consequences.
I’m sure this won’t be misinterpreted at all.
In Pablo’s room, Guido and Tomás are fighting over Fernanda. Their pissing match is interrupted by Marizza, who tells them that Pablo’s run away. She says one of them should tell Mama B and leaves, and Guido and Tomás are like, “Pfft, Pablo run away? That’s totally impossible.”
Feli calls Augusto, again. He doesn’t pick up, again. She overhears Blas drag Lujan into the lounge and yell at her. She insists she wasn’t doing anything wrong with Marcos (apart from beating him up), and Blas snarks that she’ll never be a normal person and she should just go back to the streets. Feli tries to help Lujan, but Lujan wails that she’s a lost cause and they’re going to kick her out.
Meanwhile, Luna’s putting mayonnaise on Pilar’s hair for…reasons. After she leaves, Marizza wants to know why Luna’s letting Pilar hang around, and Luna’s like, “Pilar has done nothing wrong ever in her life!” Still, she picks up that Marizza’s not really upset over Pilar. Marizza mumbles that Pablo’s left with Paula, and Luna’s like, “Holy shit, you have to do something.” Marizza’s like, “Why me?” I mean, she is the smartest of all Pablo’s acquaintances, let’s be real. Marizza finally admits that she does kinda like Pablo, deep down. Then Feli bursts in and she’s like, “You guys have to do something about Lujan!” Marizza’s like, “Do I have to do everything around here?”
Papa C and Sonia have a hella sexually charged conversation about her leaving the family alone. Papa C writes her a check and makes a snide remark about how this isn’t the first time she’s taken money from a guy, which Sonia does not like at all. She takes the check and he says he doesn’t want to ever see her again, and she agrees that a contract is a contract. And yet, somehow, I bet he will see her again.
Personal space, what’s that?
Lujan is packing her bags, and tells Marizza and Luna that they’re going to kick her out of school for something she didn’t do. She wants to leave before they can expel her. Luna’s like, “Surely if you fight for your rights they’ll listen to you!” Lujan’s like, “Are you new, Luna?” Marizza gets some of her energy back and says they’ll help Lujan out.
The next day. Feli tries to tell Mia that Blas is a dick, and as usual Mia’s like, “But he’s so dreamy!” Feli tells Mia and Vico that Blas thinks Lujan and Marcos slept together — but Feli knows it’s not true! Vico’s like, “Too bad, because they both need to get laid.” Feli snaps at her to shut up. I like Feli caring about something other than Manuel and/or Augusto, but it’s kinda sad that she’s going so hard for someone who punches her out every time she tries to help. Feli asks Mia to help. She’s the only one of their trio that hasn’t had a friendship moment with Lujan yet!
Fernanda rocks up to Tomás at his locker, and — dude, Tomás has boobs on his locker, in plain sight. That seems inappropriate. Anyway, she asks if they can talk, and Tomás nearly trips over his boner trying to follow her. Guido watches them walk off, and shakes his head. I can’t tell if he’s actually upset or not. Fernanda asks Tomás what’s up with Guido, and Tomás BSes that Guido’s totally in love with Mia, and he would never look at Fernanda, so Fernanda should just get back together with Tomás, if she gets his drift. Then Guido shows up and pulls Tomás away, telling him that Pablo’s run away and they need to cover for him. I mean…didn’t he run away forever? They have to cover for him for two years until graduation? That seems unrealistic. No, just kidding, Pablo tells him they only have to give him enough time to get far away. Guido of all people tells him to think hard about what he’s doing, but Pablo’s like, “The only thing that matters is my girlfriend who I met a month ago!” He says he’s at the bus terminal and he’s leaving forever, and they hang up.
Mia sucks it up and goes to Blas to talk about Lujan. Aw, Mia! I still love her, horrible judge of character though she is. She insists that Lujan wouldn’t have spent the night with Marcos, because Lujan is incredibly emotionally immature and Marcos is a geek with secret anger issues. No, just kidding, she says she knows Lujan and she would never do something like that. Blas tells her that Lujan stole Renata’s wallet, and Mia’s like, “Are you sure?” and he’s like, “Dunoff never lies!” He changes the subject to Mia, which sufficiently distracts her. Oh, Mia. She’s so predictable. He asks if she told Manuel that she and Blas are dating, and Mia admits that she did. He’s like, “There are dreams that cannot be, Mia!” and strokes her hair. SOMEONE ARREST HIM ALREADY.
Meanwhile, Dunoff is talking to Sonia, trying to shut her dance group down. He’s like, “Let’s not forget what happened the last time you taught a class here.” Sonia’s like, “What are you talking about, that went perfectly.” Dunoff points out that Marizza doesn’t want her to do it, and that gets Sonia’s attention. Then Gloria comes in and says she has a letter from Lujan’s lawyer. Dunoff’s like, “Ha, orphans don’t have lawyers!” True. She could have an ineffectual banker, though, like the Baudelaires! Dunoff scowls at Sonia that this is more of Marizza’s shenanigans.
Speaking of Marizza! She’s asking Guido and Tomás where Pablo went. “The bus terminal,” Tomás derps. Marizza’s like, “But where was he going?” and they’re like, “Hurr durr we didn’t ask.” Tomás says Pablo wants them to cover for him, and since they’re his friends, they have to do what he says. Marizza thinks that’s stupid, even though that’s the same approach she takes with Luna and Lujan. She whips out her phone and dials Mama B, but before she can say anything, Dunoff comes in. He tells Marizza there’s a problem with her: “The problem is always with you.” Hee! Not untrue. She tells him she wants proof and witnesses before they expel Lujan. “You’re not a lawyer,” Dunoff points out. “And you’re not a judge,” Marizza snips. She says she’s going to get her mom, but for once, Sonia refuses to meddle. What? Sonia, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but you really need to unequivocally back your daughter up here.
Mama B is at lunch with her sidepiece, the Unattractive Ashmore Triplet. Mama B frets that Marizza called her about Pablo, but hung up before she could say anything. So…call her back? Does everyone’s cell phone only go one way? Unattractive Ashmore Triplet derps that Pablo’s at school, where he’s being taken care of. Ha! As if! But he tells Mama B to call Marizza if it will make her feel better. Marizza doesn’t pick up, and Unattractive Ashmore Triplet says they should toast to relaxing while Papa B is away. “With water?” Mama B asks. Unattractive Ashmore Triplet’s like, “Why not?” Aw. He’s kinda charming, actually. I think I like him.
At the bus station, Pablo’s being emo over leaving Mama B behind. Paula’s like, “Are you saying you care about people besides me, because that shit will not stand.” She says their bus is leaving in an hour, and he can call Mama B when they’ve successfully escaped Buenos Aires. Pablo says he has to text Guido and Tomás, which perturbs Paula.
Lujan drags Feli off to the gym to practice jumping over the boxes. “Not the gym!” Feli wails. Hee. I think we’ve all been there. For some reason, they go to the office, and Lujan…throws Gloria the shaka sign? I don’t know, but it’s funny. God love her.
At Casa Colucci, Papa C’s fretting over whether or not Sonia’s deposited his check, and sealed the deal on staying away from the Coluccis forever. He calls his bank and they tell him that she has indeed deposited it. Mercedes goes crazy with villainous glee, ranting that she knows how women like Sonia are, and she knew Sonia would take the check. She hands Papa C the phone and tells him to call Luca and Mia and tell them what’s happened. “This is the end of Sonia Rey,” Papa C says. Mercedes is all smug. You’d think at some point he would notice she has the trademark Soap Opera Villain Smirk (TM).
In Manuel’s room, Marcos is freaking out on Nico over what to do about Lujan. Marizza runs in and tells them that the Society’s framed Lujan, and Nico and Marcos are like, “Awkward.” Marcos denies knowledge, and Nico’s like, “Double awkward.” Marizza is smart enough not to entirely believe him.
Mama B calls Gloria and asks her to check on Pablo. Meanwhile, Guido and Tomás get his text that he’s leaving. They’re like, “Ohoho, covering for him will be easy! We can totally do it!” Then Gloria knocks on the door, asking for Pablo. They’re like, “Nevermind.” They manage to BS a story about Pablo having a toothache, and she accepts this and leaves. “Thank you in the name of Pablo, who’s sleeping like an angel!” Tomás chirps. HEE! After she leaves, he breathes a sigh of relief that they managed to head her off. “Yeah, thanks to me,” Guido says. It’s a sad day when Guido’s the brains of the operation, but that’s what happens when your only other choice is Tomás, I guess.
Mama B tells Unattractive Ashmore Triplet that she wants to go to the school and see Pablo. Unattractive Ashmore Triplet is like, “Hello, you promised to spend this week cheating on your husband with me. Screw your kid!” Nevermind, I don’t like him anymore.
Lujan rants to Marizza and Luna that she hates the person who framed her for stealing the wallet, and Marizza’s like, “Wait, do you know who it is?” Lujan refuses to throw Marcos under the bus for some reason, and mutters that it doesn’t matter, Dunoff and Blas want an excuse to kick her out anyway. Marcos can somehow hear this conversation in the classroom behind the window, and he looks perturbed.
Papa C tells Luca and Mia that Sonia accepted money to never talk to them again. Mia and Luca look mildly upset, but immediately leap to her defense. When they leave the office, Sonia is outside, with reporters and a huge crowd cheering for Papa C. The reporter asks him where he got the idea to donate money for a…soup kitchen, it sounds like? (“Comedor municipal”). The crowd’s all happy that Papa C’s giving money to the poor, and he can’t say the check was to pay off Sonia without sounding like a dick. Well played, Sonia.
Marcos sneaks into the teachers’ lounge while they’re all distracted by Gloria giving them their bonus checks, and he steals all of their wallets. Meanwhile, Dunoff’s in his office, ranting that something has to be done about Lujan. Blas is like, “Oooh, me, pick me, I will destroy her emotionally and kick her out of the school!” Dunoff’s like, “Ohoho, an excellent idea, I trust you to definitely abuse your position of power over a teenage girl!” Then Gloria runs in and shrieks at Dunoff that the wallets are all gone. Hilda, the econ teacher, and the chem teacher all yell at him to do something, and he snaps that he’ll find a solution. Understandably, they don’t look convinced.
Mama B shows up to the school, just as Guido’s telling Tomás that nothing could go wrong. Guido’s just asking for it now. They try to head her off, but she immediately checks the bed and sees that they’ve stuffed a pillow and a backpack under the covers. They admit that he snuck out with his girlfriend, but BS that they’ll call her as soon as he comes back, and Mama B agrees not to tell Dunoff. She’s about to leave, but then Marizza comes in and tells her that Pablo’s run away. Tomás caves and admits that Pablo’s at the bus station. “The bus station?” Mama B asks. Is there only one in the whole city? She and Marizza storm off to save Pablo from his own dumbassery. Guido and Tomás are all like, “Wow, I can’t believe we didn’t manage to outwit them.” Me too, guys. Me too. Luckily for Mama B and Marizza, at the bus station, Pablo and Paula find out that their bus is delayed. But not delayed enough! Mama B and Marizza show up just as it’s boarding, and Pablo ducks under the window so they don’t see him. The bus pulls out of the station, and Pablo is gone forever~*~*~
Haha, just kidding, there are like 280 episodes of this show left. Why don’t Mama B and Marizza just find out where the bus’s destination is?
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