Dudes, I bought some ghost pepper chips the other day and they are like…not spicy. At all. I’m so disappointed. I just thought I’d share.
Previously on Rebelde Way: Erreway played one song at the club, and now they’re as famous as the Beatles, or something. Feli ran away and straight into the arms of Vico’s douchey brother, while Mia replaced her in the band, as we all knew she was going to. Vico broke up with Manuel, while Marizza and Pablo decided to fake date for the greater good (the greater good!). Then Feli decided she wanted to be in the band after all, but as we all know, they can only be four! Will they choose the secondary character with low self-esteem, or the main character in the band photos? The suspense is killing me!
Opening monologue: Two seconds ago we kissed, and now I’m a real man. Two seconds ago, I didn’t know…hold on, they’re just reciting the lyrics to “Dos segundos“! Come on, show.
We pick up where we left off, with Manuel being the tiebreaker between Mia and Feli as the band’s fourth member. He waffles a bit and then is like, “Just kidding, obviously Feli.” Mia gets all pissy and says that if she wants to be in a band, she’ll just get Papa C to buy one for her. Okay, Draco Malfoy. She storms off and Pablo’s like, “Uh, yeah, I guess now is a good time to mention that Mia was the one writing the lyrics.” Everyone’s like, “Whatever, nobody seems to mind that we only played one song at our gig anyway.” Just kidding. They’re all like, we need a new song by next week! WHAT DO. After the band meeting breaks up, Pablo and Marizza muse over their fake dating situation. They decide to keep up the ruse around their parents, but not mention it to anyone else. Then they get into fight over whether or not they’re embarrassed by each other. Heh.
You’ll recall that when we last left Sonia and Papa C, they’d bumped cars on account of Sonia going the wrong way up the street. Now she’s got a bandage wrapped around her head and threatening to sue Papa C (as usual). Pepa sycophantically goes along with this. “Every time we meet, you call your lawyer,” Papa C deadpans. HEE.
Tomás bizarrely has no money, for the purposes of this secondary plotline. Some random other student has gotten all threateny with him, and now he’s fretting to Pablo and Guido what to do. I’ll admit I was multitasking while trying to watch this episode, but I don’t think it’s every really mentioned why he’s broke? Did his parents cut him off after his shenanigans with Pablo’s kidnapping? It’s not clear. Anyway, Tomás has no money. As he bemoans his situation, Joaquin EVILLY eavesdrops.
Night falls, but Pablo is wide awake. He’s like, “Damn, kissing Marizza was super fun. WHAT COULD THIS MEAN?” Inspiration strikes and he gets up in the middle of the night to compose a song on his guitar. Aw, shit, I had a roommate who did stuff like that. It’s not as cute as this show makes it seem.
I swear to God, I think I have more armpit hair than Pablo.
In Marizza’s room, Lujan and Luna commiserate over what a dick Blas is. Marizza overhears this and jumps on their conversation: “What did Pablo do now?!” Lujan and Luna are like, “Uh…not everything is about Pablo.” Marizza tells Lujan to get her mysterious tutor involved so Blas will back off, but Lujan’s like, “Hell no.” She wants to fix the problem herself (probably with her fists, as usual). But the second she sets foot outside of the room, she finds Blas creepin’ in the hallway, probably waiting to hit on some more underage girls. Case in point: he tells her he wants to meet her in the map room. Dude! Gross! Punch him, Lujan!
Mia’s room. Vico and Feli do some more product placement for Pepsi. I cannot ever remembering caring that much about soda cap contests, even when I was a naive eleven-year-old and sent off to win a free Backstreet Boys poster or whatever. ANYWAY, Mia wails that she is having a CRISIS, and everyone has ABANDONED her. She runs off dramatically, and Feli’s like, “Oh Lord” and follows her. Once she’s alone, Vico stares at a photo of Manuel and cries. Oh, Vico. You’ll get a love interest (and an uglier haircut) eventually, but not for like another two hundred episodes.
Joaquin sidles up to Tomás and suggests that he might know a way for Tomás to get some money, if Tomás gets his drift, and he thinks Tomás does. Joaquin is really overestimating Tomás’s intellectual capabilities. Tomás is like, “Ohoho, are you suggesting that I, Tomás Ezcurra, should WORK for a living?” Joaquin’s like, “I mean, it’s not like dealing drugs is HARD, but whatever.” Not in so many words. Tomás is intrigued, although not smart enough to pick up on what Joaquin’s putting down.
Mia’s emoing around school and refusing to talk to anyone, to the point that Feli’s guilted into trying to give up her place. Manuel’s like, “Hell no, we need a fourth person AND I really want to stick it to Mia, this is like two birds with one stone!” Then Gloria runs up and gives Feli a delivery, which turns out to be a book from Augusto. She’s all twitterpated, and Manuel’s like, “Excuse you, you’re not pining away for me anymore, I do not approve.”
“How come you’re not obsessed with ME anymore?”
Main office. All the teachers come back from the weekend, including Lulu and the econ teacher (“Carlos”). They’re all giggly and twitterpated, and Mansilla is immediately suspicious that they hella banged over the weekend. Gloria is all sniffy: how dare Mansilla imply such a thing, the econ teacher is married! Oh, Gloria, you should know that that’s never stopped anyone in this school.
Blas meets Lujan in the map room. So inappropriate! Nothing good has ever gone down in this room! He knocks over a bunch of maps and tells her to pick them up and arrange them, or he’ll get her in trouble. Are they paying this guy for the sole purpose of shoving the students around? A+ budgeting at Elite Way!
Classroom. The econ teacher is going on about how economics follows the natural order, only the strong survive, blah blah Ayn Rand blah. The business world isn’t for the WEAK. Manuel’s all like, excuse you! Meanwhile, Pablo is texting Marizza that they’ll mack it in front of their parents, but as far as their classmates are concerned, their relationship has to be TOP SECRET. So naturally, when the econ teacher busts Marizza texting, she immediately spills the beans to the entire class. Pablo reluctantly backs her up. The econ teacher is like, “Love is stupid. Write me a paper as punishment for texting.” After class, everyone’s all gossipy about them. Some random girl comes up to Pablo and Marizza asking if it’s true. Pablo’s about to tell her the truth, but Marizza kisses him before he can start talking. Sonia calls Marizza and asks if she wants to have lunch together and Marizza’s like, “Can’t hang, gotta d8 Pablo!” She hands the phone to Pablo, and Sonia wails that Pablo can’t ever leave Marizza alone. Oh, so Pablo’s going to start stalking Marizza? He can get tips from Manuel!
Casa Colucci. Papa C calls Sonia and tries to apologize for her not-injury, but she gets Pepa to troll him with tales of Sonia’s injury getting infected and how she’s going to sue EVEN MORE. When they hang up, even Pepa’s like, “What’s your damage with this guy?” and Sonia starts ranting about how she’s DONE with men like Papa C, and she wants to DESTROY HIS LIFE FOREVER.
Tomás is hanging out in the courtyard where he sees Joaquin doing his drug deal in front of God and everybody, as usual. Joaquin needles Tomás about selling ~what people need~ some more, until Tomás finally figures it out: “YOU’RE DEALING DRUGS?” Way to tell the whole school, Tomás! Joaquin lies that he doesn’t take them; just sells them. He shoves some into Tomás’s hands and is like, “Woo! Have fun with them!” Poor dumb Tomás.
The girls arrive for gym class, only to see the boys crowded around the mirror, laughing at a photo of Vico. We don’t see the whole thing, but it looks like her head’s been pasted onto a naked body. Mia storms up and starts yelling at them all for laughing at it, God love her. Bizarrely, Manuel’s in the crowd of boys, but makes no move to start yelling at and/or beating up any of them. You’re slacking, Manuel! Vico tears down the photo and sees the Society’s calling card taped behind it. Dun dun dun!
Mansilla needles Sandra about Lulu, and she agrees to tell him anything she finds out. Later on, Lulu and the econ teacher (I’m really having a problem calling him by name, he’s just “the econ teacher” in my head) are discussing the dance competition, which weirdly only wants boys to enter. Lulu decides to go along with it, and the econ teacher invites her to dinner to celebrate. Sandra rocks up to cockblock him, and Lulu runs off to class. She shows up to class and is like, “I see my class has descended into chaos again, but discipline is haaard, let’s just move on.” She sends the girls out of the room and tells the boys that they’re going to a dance competition, and not to tell the girls about it. This will end well. They do a gratuitous dance routine and get all excited about going to a competition. Mia pokes her head in and overhears all of it. Well, that secret lasted about a second.
Lujan sucks it up and decides to ask her tutor for help.
Band practice. Marizza and Feli fight over which one of them has been meaner to the other (hint: probably Marizza), but the fight gets broken up when all the guys come in all twitterpated over Lulu. Feli tells them that Mia agreed to write them lyrics after all, and gives the envelope to Manuel. The letter turns out to be like, “Manuel is the worst, go back to Mexico, bye.” Oh, Mia. Pablo’s like, “Well, I was emoing over Marizza last night, and I wrote something.” Marizza starts needling him over his crappy writing, like, damn Marizza, I don’t see you coming up with anything. Then Pablo starts playing his guitar and Marizza gets kind of into it. Could she be attracted to him and his sad guitar songs? She totally could be. Then we have to sit through the video for “Dos segundos“. Not “Inmortal” or “Bonita de más”? We’re really expanding our options here!
When the girls have dance practice, Mia asks Lulu if she’s perhaps heard of any dance competitions they might be entering. Lulu’s like, “Nope.” Mia is not pleased.
I feel that, Mia.
Joaquin talks Tomás into delivering some drugs for him. He asks who they’re for, and Joaquin whispers a name into his ear. Tomás is all shocked.
Erreway goes back to school all excited over their new song, but Mama Provenza is in the main hall. She throws herself at Nico and starts crying. Nico immediately freaks out: “What’s wrong with Dad?” Cliffhanger!
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