Previously on Rebelde Way: Feli congratulated Sonia and Papa C on their romantic relationship in front of God and everybody. Surely there isn’t a way out of this, and they’ll finally have to come clean to their children!
JK, Feli pretends that she was talking to Mama and Papa Guido — who really are quite adorable, although I’m sure they’d be happier if they didn’t have such a trash son — and everyone’s like, “But of course!” and moves on. Sigh. Meanwhile, Feli is so effusive and gushing over Guido’s parents that they start thinking that she’s dating Guido. Man, don’t Feli like that, you guys.
Martavio comes in and is super bummed to see the low turnout. He tells Marizza and Mia that the psychologist hasn’t shown up, and they’re like, “Oh. Well, shit.”
Over in the cafeteria, Guido and the tertiary students go on about how they wouldn’t be caught DEAD at the assembly, learning about gay people and trying to be less homophobic. Then Feli runs in and tells Guido that his parents have shown up, and everyone makes fun of him. Because…his parents coming to a meeting that they were told was mandatory…somehow makes Guido gay? I don’t know.
Marizza goes to try and round up some support for Martavio. She finds the other teachers hiding out in the teachers’ lounge and tries to convince them to attend the assembly. She gives a big speech about how they should support tolerance and love, but Carmen’s like, “Nobody cares what you think!” and kicks her out. After Marizza leaves, Hilda’s like, “You know what? She was right. Let’s go to the assembly for great justice!” It’s nice and all, but damn Hilda, you couldn’t have backed Marizza up when she was actually in the room?
Laura rants to Marcos that a bunch of their schoolmates won’t go to the assembly because they’re a bunch of macho homophobes. Marcos wants to know which of their classmates DID go — like, specifically, did Lujan go? Way to prioritize, Marcos. He quickly covers and says that he’s just worried because he saw her crying. Laura’s like, “Pfft, Lujan never cries.” Way to be concerned, Laura! Then she wonders if Lujan was crying over Marcos and Laura getting back together, and Marcos is all, “Impossible!” And then the opening bars of “A Sorta Fairytale” by Tori Amos start playing in the background, and I SHRIEKED because a) I love Tori Amos and b) what a bizarre song choice. I fully believe that they picked that song solely because it has the word “fairytale” in it, much like Taylor Swift did.
(Although actually, given that Tori Amos has a huge gay fanbase, this is kind of a hilariously appropriate use of her music nevertheless.)
Anyway, Laura is mad that Lujan and Marcos still liiiike each other and storms off. Marcos is all smiley over the thought that Lujan still likes him. I hate myself for shipping them so much.
Guido begs his parents not to embarrass him by not being homophobic. He tells them that the assembly is about gay people, and he gets upset when they chirp that they’d like to learn more about gay people. How very dare his parents! They should just be heavily uncomfortable with homosexuality like most parents in the early 2000s were! Guido wails that them attending the assembly will make everyone think he’s gay, which he TOTALLY ISN’T. “Well, of course not, we just met your new little girlfriend,” his mom says. Guido’s like, “Huh?” and they’re like, “You know, Feli.” Diego approaches at that moment and starts laughing at Guido dating the resident fat girl. Can this school have an assembly on fat-shaming next, because my God.
And then, of course, Feli’s mom also walks in, and she’s all disturbed that Feli’s classmates call her “the fat girl.” I mean, Marizza has called Feli much worse, actually. She immediately runs off to tell Feli that Guido was yelling that he would NEVER date a fat girl, and he’d rather DIE than date someone who looks like Feli. Okay, so die? Like she wants to date Guido anyway. Feli’s mom goes on to say that she doesn’t want to attend the assembly because she doesn’t really care that much. Feli snipes that maybe her mom should care about discrimination against fat people, because soon they’ll be banned from this school. Then she flounces out, Mia and Vico following.
Pablo remarks to Martavio and Marizza that hardly anyone has shown up, and Marizza snipes at him that a whole group of kids is boycotting the assembly — and Pablo’s friend Guido is their ringleader. She’s quite snippy about it, and she’s not wrong. Why are ANY of them still friends with Guido? He is a terrible, sexist, homophobic, classist, probably would be racist if this school had any nonwhite kids in it, douche.
Papa B and Dunoff come over to gloat that the psychologist can’t make it, probably because they’re being weighed down with a cement overcoat right this minute. Marizza runs off to save the day, by asking Sonia to give a speech. “But I’ve never given a speech about sex before!” Sonia wails. THAT IS A DAMN LIE! She did it in season 1! I HAVEN’T FORGOTTEN, SHOW. She refuses and Marizza stomps off.
Pablo goes to round up their errant classmates. Guido refuses to go, because “[he has] an image to maintain.” “Don’t be stupid,” Pablo says to that. HEE! He gives them a speech about rebelling against Dunoff, and they agree to go.
In the hall, Dunoff is telling all the parents about how they have no idea how this CRAZY idea of Martavio’s got greenlit, and they would NEVER have allowed this to go on if they knew! Committing hate crimes against your classmates is cool as long as it’s off-campus! Good talk; everyone can go home now. But then Sonia swans in and announces that she’s going to give the speech instead. Papa B tries to shut her down, and Sonia’s like, “Why shouldn’t I give the speech? I’m a person, too; I have red blood just like you. I pay my taxes, too — assuming you do, of course.” HEE.
Anyway, of course Sonia’s speech is amazing and everyone loves her. Just like they did the first time she did it which apparently no one remembers now.
Papa B storms off to Dunoff’s office to yell at him about how Sonia’s incited rebeldía into all the kids, blah blah blah. Dunoff immediately gets an angry call from one of the homophobic guys’ dads, who’s all mad that Rocco filed a report and his son might get in trouble for beating people up for being gay. Papa B’s like, “I thought you were going to cover this up!” and Dunoff’s like, “Sorry, I’m not as good at corruption as you :(” Papa B yells at Dunoff to get the kids to take their denouncement back.
Sonia’s taking questions from the audience after her speech. Rocco’s dad and Feli’s mom make a bunch of passive-aggressive comments about what to do with kids who are being negatively influenced by their friends — in some cases, their friends are making them gay! Sonia’s like, “Gay people are born that way, listen to some Lady Gaga.” She gives another speech about accepting people’s natural differences, and Hilda backs her up. And then everyone on the bus in the hall claps, literally.
Aaaanyway Sonia’s speeches go on for like another five minutes and they’re all very inspirational and shit. Everyone claps again, some more, and Marizza all pensive over this development.
Michi catches Dunoff looking through her stuff for the homophobic guys’ names. He agrees not to go through her stuff if she’ll help him, which she doesn’t argue with. Collaborating with Dunoff, Michi? You disappoint me. Then all the parents come in and congratulate Dunoff on such a great talk, and he’s like, “Oh but of course, I supported this brilliant idea from the start!” Feli’s mom asks Dunoff if it’s true that fat kids are going to be banned from Elite Way, and he’s like, “What? Of course not; I’ll let their classmates bully the shit out of them, but I still want your money.”
Papa C tries to talk to Mia about Sonia some more. Mia is all upset that Papa C is trying to move on from Mama C. She says that Sonia is a showgirl/cabaret performer and she’s in magazines and it’s just not right! Oh, is this an actual objection of Mia’s? I thought she was just saying that earlier to be a dick. Papa C tries to speechify to her that he loves Sonia and it’s been 15 literal years since Mia’s mom died/left/whatever lie they’re on now. Sadly, he is not as inspirational as Sonia or Pablo, and Mia is unmoved. She tells him to end the relationship. Papa C tells her to deal with it and leaves.
Pablo once again reminds Marizza that she’s lucky to have parents who aren’t abusive dickbags. Marizza accepts this more gracefully this time, and also thanks him for forcing the other kids to go to the assembly. He needles her that they were on the same page re: helping Martavio, and Marizza gets all embarrassed and blusters that it was just one time. They’re so cute together! Anyway, she also tells Pablo to tell Javier that they aren’t dating. He doesn’t want to, but their argument is cut short by Manuel. LOL. Does anyone even care about Manuel anymore? Does he even have a plot apart from following his dick around?
Manuel tells Pablo and Marizza that Sabrina’s booked Erreway for the Gran Rex again. Can’t wait for them to sell out the biggest theater in the country again without their parents finding out! They run off to tell Mia, who wants to talk to…”Johnny Guzman”? I think that’s Sabrina’s dad. LOL I don’t remember half the names on this show. Anyway, the boys bluster that she totally doesn’t need to do that, because like, it’s fine that Sabrina’s their acting manager, she’s just not their REAL manager, but they don’t need to confirm that with her dad. Mia snaps that she won’t play if she can’t talk to Mr. Guzman.
Michi approaches Feli and Vico, who give her the names of the homophobic guys. They note that one of them is the son of some deputy or another, but then they’re like, “Whatever, it’s probably not important, in our notoriously corrupt government.” Oh, you guys. Then Michi asks Feli if her mom has a problem with her head. “No, that’s her natural color,” Feli says. Heh. This episode is actually pretty funny. Michi tells them that Feli’s mom thinks that fat kids are being banned from the school, and Feli and Vico crack up that Feli’s mom believed that lie. They tell Michi what happened, and Michi is annoyed that Feli didn’t stick up for herself over Guido’s dickishness.
Vico finds Rocco being all emo in a corner playing his guitar. Rocco is so very much That One Kid we all knew in high school, and I love him for it. He explains why he initially didn’t want to report what happened and apologizes for blowing up at her for it. Even though Martavio gave him that inspirational speech and everything, he says Vico was the reason he wanted to go through with it. Aw! Vico tells him that she would die if anything happened to him. Do you know how much I love these two? I didn’t even cringe that hard when she said that. She admits that she likes him and they make out. It’s adorable. A little weird, because they never really addressed Rocco being unsure about his sexuality or his hangups about sex, but whatever, I’ll take it.
Sonia’s already left after her speech, and Martavio is bummed because he wanted to wax on about how amazing she is and stroke her ego. Marizza calls him out on still liking Sonia, and he changes the subject and asks how Marizza feels. Marizza admits that she’s proud of Sonia and she’s only still mad at her because she knows Sonia is a better person than she is. I mean…it’s not like that’s hard. MIA is a better person than Marizza is.
Michi tells Martavio that Dunoff wants to see him. He leaves, and then Laura rocks up fretting over Lujan. Marizza volunteers to talk to her, and she goes to find Lujan, who is playing a game either on a Gameboy Advance SP or on a graphing calculator. Both of those things were likely in 2003, so I can’t be sure. Anyway, Marizza brings up that Lujan was crying, and she asks if it was over Marcos and Laura. Lujan sighs that she wishes she had been crying over them. Heh. Marcos and Laura are so vain. She tells Marizza about Blas’s whole sordid threat, and Marizza’s like, “Pfft, that’s weaksauce, it’s been five seconds and I already have a plan.”
Vico tries to calm Mia down, re: Papa C and Sonia, but Mia is all mad that she isn’t getting her way. She snarls that she’s going to do what Papa C told her not to: she’s going to tell Marizza. DRAMA!
But first: Feli’s weight drama. She tries on the black dress her mother brought her and hates it. She huffs that she just won’t go to the party, but Vico and Mia tell her to stand up to her mom. They call Feli’s mom for her, and tell Feli to insist on wearing the red dress. Feli’s mom immediately shoots her down, and Feli gets all mad that everyone keeps trying to push her into sticking up for herself when she doesn’t know how. Mia and Vico encourage Feli to talk to Michi and get more life advice from her.
Pablo admits to Javier that he’s not really dating Marizza, he just made it up to get his dad off his back. He threatens that if Javier tells Papa B the truth, he’ll cut out his tongue, Titus Andronicus-style. Javier is pleased to realize that this means that Marizza is actually single, and Pablo snaps that just because he and Marizza aren’t really dating now, they will be soon. “You’re perverse,” Javier says. Not this from the underwear thief.
Michi turns in the list of names to Dunoff, and he yells at her for not getting it done fast enough. It took her less than an episode; that’s like lightning speed in this show’s universe. Anyway, Feli comes in and is like, “Okay, teach me how to stand up for myself.” Michi tells her that strength has to come from within, and it’s worth trying to argue with her mom — but as for Guido, he sucks and they should just troll that fatphobic loser. (She literally calls Guido fatphobic; way to predict Tumblr by a decade, Michi.) She dictates a weird, inappropriate, over-the-top letter for Feli to give to Guido.
Martavio and Dunoff fight again, some more, over Martavio wanting to do the right thing and Dunoff wanting to cover it up. Martavio refuses to retract the report, and Dunoff goes crying to Papa B. He wails that one of the boys is the son of a very important deputy named Martinez Possi (I think? Bro, idk if I’m spelling any of these names right). Papa B says that Martinez Possi always votes against him — so actually, if he could reveal his son as a raging homophobe, that would be quite good for Papa B, politically. He’s like, “You know what we have to do, Dunoff!” and Dunoff’s like, “Yes, cover this all up!” and Papa B’s like, “No, we’re going to support Martavio and Rocco and stand up for gay people everywhere! To ruin Martinez Possi’s voter base!”
Pablo comes in, and Papa B tells him that he’s going to support Martavio. Pablo’s like, “Amazing! Maybe you’re actually a good person, dad!” Oh, Pablo, you’re so naive. I see he’s picking up the slack since Tomás hasn’t appeared in this episode once.
Marizza tries to convince Mia to let the whole manager thing go. Mia points out that she still thinks that Sabrina is really the manager, and the boys are trying to hide this from them. Marizza calls Mr. Guzman’s office to prove it, and his secretary tells her that he’s peaced out and is living in England now. Mia’s all, “I told you so!” and Marizza whaps her on the head with the phone. Hee.
Hilda tells Sonia how awesome her speech was, and Sonia’s like, “I had never done a thing like that before, I was so scared!” Sonia, you already — oh my God, whatever. Then Marizza comes by, and the heartwarming music indicates that a reunion is imminent.
Back at school, Mia is chewing Pablo and Manuel out for lying about Sabrina. She says that she won’t play, and she and Manuel get in each other’s faces until Pablo has to pull them apart. Is this what ABBA was like? Pablo sits Mia down and tries to talk rationally, but she still won’t do it. Manuel jumps in front of Pablo and starts manhandling Mia, as he’s wont to do. She snipes at him that she doesn’t need money like he does, and she won’t help him get it. BURN. She stalks off, and then Manuel grabs his head and collapses. OMG, do you think maybe those headaches of his were important after all?
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