Previously on Rebelde Way: Blas has been hit by a car! But let’s open with Lalo and Feli’s love drama, because that’s what everyone cares about.
Michi has very nearly been busted sneaking Feli out of school by the two suits who are meant to be watching Feli’s every move. Of course, the suits haven’t seemed to notice that she is out of their sight; instead one of the guys stops Michi’s car and says he thought he heard a noise from her backseat (where Feli is hiding). Michi makes up a whole thing about how her car just makes weird noises since it’s on the verge of breaking down, but she doesn’t mind all that, it gives the car character! The suits are like, “Well maybe you shouldn’t leave if you’re a danger to everyone on the road?” and Michi’s like, “Road safety is for squares. Bye now!” And then she and Feli leave, and presumably Feli’s bodyguards just keep on not actually watching her.
Fernanda and Pilar sit together and complain about Sol’s budding modeling career. Fernanda weirdly complains that modeling is all about your name, who who you know, and how much money you have, which like…is Fernanda not also rich? Doesn’t she base her entire personality on being distantly related to English nobility? Whatever. Then Sol rocks up and Fernanda and Pilar immediately start asking her about Maxi: did Sol know that Maxi’s aunt owns a clothing company? That sure is an interesting fact, isn’t it? Sol pretends not to know about this and swans off.
Fernanda puzzles over why Sol is lying to them: it’s so weird how she’ll act like their best friends one minute, and the next she doesn’t trust them at all! Pilar’s like, “That’s because she’s just using us whenever she feels like it, keep up.” She tells Fernanda that they need to come up with a plot to show Sol that they’re not as dumb and worthless as she thinks they are. Heh.
Meanwhile, Guido and Augustina are making out. Gross. Augustina starts sniffling at him that she just doesn’t know if she can trust him. Guido’s like, “Of course I’ll never cheat on you again! In fact, it’s pretty offensive that you don’t believe me!” Augustina’s like, “Oh, well now that you’ve said it out loud, I believe you.” I hate them both. Guido assures her that she’s different to the other girls he’s dated, and by that he means that she has money that he can use. Augustina does not think this is a red flag and encourages him to go on, so Guido starts rambling about how she’s so pure and innocent and not like those slutty girls he’s dated before, because it’s 2003 and the virgin/whore dichotomy is alive and well. He rambles so much that he trips into saying that he wants her to be the mother of his children, which Augustina is tragically thrilled about.
Augustina is still unconvinced, though, so she tells Guido to prove his love by burning his little black book of girls’ numbers. Guido begrudgingly does so and throws it out the window. He immediately then runs after it to try and save it — which somehow Augustina does not notice? — but it’s too late. I’m sure all those girls are relieved they won’t have to dodge Guido’s calls anymore.
Papa C goes back to Sonia and tells her about Papa B’s threat. He says that he didn’t give up Erreway’s tour dates — that would be unthinkable! the revolution would crumble! I can’t believe Papa B can’t just google the dates. Instead, Papa C is going to fight this the Right Way, with lawyers and justice and all that. He tells Sonia not to worry about it, but as soon as he leaves, Sonia picks up the phone and calls someone.
As Guido mourns his thot list, Tomás and Francisco run in saying that they’ve found a place to practice soccer so they can beat the girls. Because this ~elite~ school doesn’t even have a gym, much less a soccer field. They mention that the practice place is kind of pricey, but they figure the prize money will more than make up for it. “If we win,” Tomás ominouses. But then they look over and see Laura and Lola clumsily kicking a ball between themselves, and the boys cackle that GIIIIIRLS will never beat them at soccer.
Pilar and Fernanda call Maxi’s aunt and say that they’re interested in trying out for the modeling job. They add that they both have brown hair, and Maxi’s aunt agrees to send a photographer to the school to check them out.
Feli and Michi go to Lalo’s house, but he’s not there and no one knows when he’ll be back. Convenient! Michi sighs that they can’t just camp out in front of his house all day, and Feli snipes that Michi can go back to Elite Way if she wants, but Feli is staying right here because her entire life revolves around a boy now. SIGH.
Then Lalo’s ex-girlfriend (“Chela”, I think?) and one of his friends who looks like Uncle Jesse from Full House walk by. Uncle Jesse derps that it looks like Feli is waiting for Lalo, and they should go tell her where he is! Chela is big mad to see that Feli and Lalo are still together, so she goes over and tells Feli that Lalo is at her house, if Feli gets her drift. She’s all, “If you have anything to say to my boyfriend, I’ll be sure to pass it on.” Feli immediately believes this girl, whom she has only met once before and who was a total dick to her, and decides that Lalo is cheating on her.
Marcos and Lujan are still at the hospital. They’re on the phone trying to arrange a place for Blas to stay when he gets better, but the doctor comes up and says that there’s not really gonna be a “when he gets better” for Blas. Marcos and Lujan are like “Say what?” and the doctor’s like, “Dude, he had a head-on collision with a truck that was twice the size of his car, you’re lucky he’s hanging on long enough for you to get a final dramatic scene with him.” Lujan breaks down crying, and Marcos is all, “This is sad and all, but…he did try to strangle you more than once, so what’s your deal?” Lujan starts bawling that he was the only person who ever cared about her and now he’s dying!!! Marcos is like, “He hated you tho” and Lujan’s like, “He paid my tuition!! That’s the same thing as saving someone’s life!!” She insists that the doctor take them to see Blas and the doctor’s like, “Oh, well, if you insist, fuck the rules about only family members seeing someone in the hospital.”
Javier sneaks into Manuel’s room and finds a folder that Manuel has helpfully labeled “ERREWAY TOUR.” Manuel, I swear to God. Francisco comes in and wants to know why Javier’s lurking around here, to which Javier quickly BSes that he was looking for Francisco. Javier wants to talk to Marizza, and he knows Francisco must know how to get in touch with Erreway, since he’s been talking to Mia. Francisco is suspicious and asks why Javier doesn’t just email her, but Javier says that Marizza doesn’t have an email address. Francisco agrees to give him the phone number of the theater where Erreway is currently playing. Oh, Francisco.
Sonia’s invited her old director over, whom we haven’t seen in a solid 130 episodes. Sonia asks him about casting her in his next show so the Colucci-Spirito family can have some cash flow. The director immediately falls all over himself to take her back, even though last time we saw them together, he was mad at her because she kept ditching his rehearsals to deal with her personal drama. Obviously, Sonia’s actual competence at her job is secondary to her powers as a main character, and he gushes over how fantastic she is and how all other women are like clumsy cows on stage compared to her.
Lujan and Marcos go into Blas’s hospital room, where he’s hooked up to a bunch of machines. The doctor says that he’s basically brain dead and he won’t survive if he’s taken off of life support. Marcos is like, “Maybe we should…tell someone about this? Like our school or something?” Lujan’s like, “No way, we’re 16 years old and we can definitely handle this on our own!” She starts going on about how Blas was all stoic and strong and he would have hated for everyone to know that he was suffering. She starts talking to Blas and assuring him that she’s here, and Marcos is like, “You know he can’t hear you, right?” Lujan’s like, “Shut up! We have a bond!!!”
Feli now fully believes that Lalo is cheating on her and is crying in Michi’s car. She wants to leave and lick her wounds in private, but Michi’s like, “No, now we have to wait for Lalo to come back so that you can knock his teeth out.” HEE. I’m all for Lalo getting hurt, but on the other hand, maybe these two should calm down instead of immediately believing this girl whom Feli has only met once before. I swear. Feli says that she just wants to leave and forget Lalo ever existed, so they drive off. Chela and Uncle Jesse watch them go, and Uncle Jesse is like, “Lalo is gonna be pissed that you did that.” Chela says that he’ll thank her one day, and admittedly, she rightly points out that Feli has brought Lalo only trouble: her family has sent the police after him and she’s gotten him fired from his job like three times. It does sound pretty bad when you say it like that!
Naturally, Lalo shows up just then. Wow, if only Feli had waited five more minutes. He asks Chela and Uncle Jesse what they’re up to, and they’re like, “Nothing! Definitely not ruining your relationship!” Lalo sighs that he’s been looking around for work, but there’s none to be found in the entire city of Buenos Aires. Chela suggests that he move to another city and says that she has an uncle in Cordoba who might have work for him. I fail to see how this plan works out for Chela, though? Doesn’t sending him away from Buenos Aires mean that he can’t be with her, either? I don’t know.
Marcos and Lujan come back to school. Marcos wants to tell Dunoff about Blas, but Lujan’s like, “No one must know!” But then they run into Pilar and Lujan immediately tells her that they’ve just seen Blas. She BSes that Blas left the school because he just couldn’t stand the damn kids anymore (I mean, not entirely untrue). Pilar just shrugs and says that Blas hated them and they all hated him back, so it’s not like this is a bad thing. Lujan starts sniffling and Pilar cottons on that she’s feeling some type of way about all this, but Lujan lies that she has allergies and they move on to discussing the soccer match.
Francisco writes an overly dramatic email to Mia telling her that he’s fallen into the DEPTHS OF DESPAIR in the like two days since she’s been gone. He knows she’s a nationally famous pop star and all that, but if she could find the time to write him back, ‘twould be a ray of light in his dark days. Jesus Christ, Francisco. At the end of the email, he adds that Marizza should get her own email address, since someone wants to write to her, but doesn’t know how.
Sol takes Maxi down into the basement and he starts fretting that it is most inappropriate for them to be alone together like this. Sol’s like, “Yes, that’s the point.” She tells Maxi that she likes him and Maxi gets all twitterpated, but he’s put off by how forward Sol is. Maxi is so weird. Like boys in 2003 thought girls were scarlet women if they wanted to occasionally make out in a basement. Anyway, he says he needs time to think about it. Sol says that he can give her his answer at the model casting tomorrow, where he’ll be accompanying her. He’s like, “I’m what now?” Sol wibbles that she’ll be just so embarrassed to show up alone, and she needs Maxi for moral support. He agrees.
Javier lies in bed and bitters about how nothing he does is good enough for Marizza. Maybe because — and stay with me here — you’re not entitled to her even if you help her out? Also, he spends just as much time trying to ruin the band by getting Pablo busted, so like, that kind of cancels out any of his good deeds. Speaking of! Papa B comes in, and Javier hands over Manuel’s folder of Erreway’s tour dates. Sigh. When you think about it, all the problems on this show can really be traced back to Manuel.
The kids go to art class, where Dunoff announces that Blas has left the school. All the kids are thrilled. HEE! Lujan’s all upset but like, he was creeping on all these kids and he wasn’t paying any of their tuition so…eh. One kid asks if they’re going to find a replacement for Blas, and Dunoff says that Miranda will be taking over. So Miranda is supposed to be the art teacher, the homeroom teacher, and the general supervisor of the kids’ behavior? Jesus, I hope this school pays him well.
Anyway, Miranda says that even though this is art class, they’re going to talk about the feminism assignment because this school has no schedule or rules. All the kids immediately start fanning themselves and going on about how hot it is, which is just a ploy to make Miranda turn on the ceiling fan. The kids have put a bunch of bowls full of paint on the fan’s blades, which fall off and splatter Miranda. He tells them that he’s going to leave and clean up, but their homework is still due. Heh. Nice try, Guido.
Miranda goes to the office, covered in paint, just as Dunoff and Etchamendi come in. Hijinks! Dunoff is trying to talk to Etchamendi about something, but Miranda totally hijacks the conversation and asks Etchamendi about the girls’ soccer competition. Etchamendi totally loves the idea. Rough life, Dunoff.
Michi calls Lalo’s house and asks him to meet her at school. Meanwhile, Pilar and Feli are cleaning up the art classroom. Pilar complains about the audacity of Miranda making them clean the classroom that they messed up. Feli is all on the Miranda train since he gave her advice about Lalo, and says he’s not that bad. Speaking of! Lalo shows up, because I guess that three hour commute is nothing to him. Feli is snippy with him but still helps hide him when she sees Maxi coming down the hall.
Maxi has shown up to talk to Sol — I guess it’s the next day? I don’t know — but she yells at him that she doesn’t have time to talk because she has to get pretty for the casting. She tries to make him go away, but Maxi still spots Feli.
At Casa Colucci, Papa C is going out to visit Dunoff about this whole Papa B thing. He tries to convince Sonia to come with him, but she hustles him out of the house so she can plot her stage comeback with the director.
Feli tells Lalo that she wants to break up. She BSes that she saw Maxi again and realized that she is actually in love with him, so now she is all for getting married at the age of sixteen to some guy she said she hated two weeks ago. So, bye Lalo! Lalo doesn’t buy this at all, which is fine, but then he starts grabbing Feli by the face again, which is MUCH LESS FINE. Feli doesn’t pull back and say, “That right there is why I want to break up”, although she should’ve. Instead, she sees Maxi coming down the hall, so she runs off and plants a kiss on him in front of God and everybody. Lalo storms off and all the extras are shook.
Feli runs away before Maxi can say a word, and then Sol runs up. I feel like this is the most female attention Maxi’s ever gotten in one day. Maxi tells Sol that he can’t take her to the casting now that Feli is paying attention to him again. Sol nearly has a rage meltdown that she hasn’t managed to erase Feli from Maxi’s brain, Eternal Sunshine-style, but instead of being cowed, Maxi just snaps at Sol to go to the casting alone. I hate them both, but he’s being a dick here. I’m sure we’re supposed to think this is justified because Sol is a Bad Character, though.
Lalo goes to see Michi and is all cranky with her. He asks if she’s going to help him find another job, and Michi snipes at him to ask Chela, since she and Lalo are so close. Lalo’s like, “How do you know who Chela is?” and Michi’s like, “Well, she likes to run up and verbally assault anyone who looks at you sideways, so that’s how.” Lalo says that Chela’s found him a job in Cordoba, and he really doesn’t want to go, but he figures he has to since there’s literally no other job for him in the entire of Buenos Aires. He and Michi are both vague and passive-aggressive with each other, so he leaves without them fixing anything. Like five seconds later, though, Michi has regrets and calls security to stop him from leaving. Michi, he’s like…right outside your office.
Papa C goes to see Dunoff. He’s like, “Can you rein in Papa B? He’s trying to ruin my life and it’s not exactly reflecting well on you guys.” Dunoff blusters that, you know, he can’t really get in the middle of two such fine upstanding gentlemen, so Papa C merely asks that Dunoff give him some time to sort things out, as it were. Dunoff’s like, “Do whatever you want, as long as you don’t drag me into it!” Miranda eavesdrops on this conversation and catches Papa C as he comes out of the office. He offers to help Papa C take Papa B down.
Michi drags Feli and Lalo together and tells them to talk their issues out. They go down into the basement and when we next cut back to them, they’re making out, having cleared up the whole thing with Chela. Wow, so we could’ve avoided half this episode if they had just had this five-minute talk earlier. I hate them. Feli whines that she still doesn’t know what to do about her mom and Maxi, and Lalo says everything will be fine as long as they’re together. Not to promote teenage marriage or anything, but like, if Nico and Luna could get married and move away at the age of fifteen — with a mysteriously disabled sister in tow — I feel like Feli and Lalo could do it, too. Nevertheless, Feli wibbles that she doesn’t want Lalo to leave and she doesn’t understand why he can’t just get a job in Buenos Aires. Lalo chuckles at this like, “My rich girlfriend has never worked a day in her life! How adorable!” Then Michi comes in and says that she’s managed to get Lalo a job just down the street. So there are jobs in Buenos Aires after all, they’re just only available as a plot convenience!
Lujan tries to leave to see Blas, but Miranda stops her and says that no one in fourth year is leaving until they clean the classroom and turn in their homework. Lujan’s like, “Don’t tell me what to do!” and runs off. All this drama for Blas, you guys. BLAS.
The photographer shows up to see Fernanda and Pilar, who are covered in paint from cleaning. He’s like, “Uh, I don’t think I need to see any more,” but Fernanda and Pilar insist that they just need a minute to get pretty. They do this while shoving their boobs into his face, which is super uncomfortable and weird. Anyway, the photographer calls Maxi’s aunt and says that he doesn’t think Fernanda and Pilar are model material — which is weird, because it’s not like having messy hair and paint on them made them suddenly less cute; Gemma Ward was discovered wearing a muddy barn jacket, after all — but then they come back in all cleaned up and he’s like, “Oh, never mind, they’re hot.” Ew. Step away from the underage girls, photographer guy. He decides to cast them both.
Sonia invites Hilda over to look at her costumes. Hilda’s like, “This is nice and all, but is there a reason you’re keeping it a secret from Papa C?” Sonia rambles that, you know, Papa C’s already so worried, and besides, she thinks the show will be a nice surprise for him! And the money will be an added bonus! Has Sonia forgotten that her being a semi-burlesque performer was like, a big sticking point the first time she and Papa C dated? Although thinking about that now, the fact that she gave up her career for him is not a good look at all. You’re an independent woman, Sonia! Anyway, Papa C comes back and tells Sonia and Hilda that Miranda might help him with Papa B. I only mention this because Hilda is like, “Miranda? That name sounds familiar!” Hilda, he’s literally one of your two other coworkers.
Lujan goes to the hospital and yells at Blas for not fighting his brain damage like the strong person that she knows he is. He’s in a coma, Lujan! He was in a head-on collision with a truck! I swear. She starts crying and promises him that she’ll help him fight through this, because he always helped her. I like how Lujan thinks that, on the minuscule chance that Blas does wake up, he’s not going to immediately go back to verbally abusing her and throwing her against walls every chance he gets. Like, he hated her right up until the moment he got into that car crash! I don’t understand!
Mia replies to Francisco’s email, which Francisco reads together with Marcos. Marcos is weirdly fixated on whether or not Mia wrote anything lovey-dovey or like, sent Francisco nudes. It’s 2003, Marcos. Attachments couldn’t be bigger than like, 10 kb. Anyway, Mia’s like, “Touring is awesome and tons of people come to our shows, which we haven’t announced or promoted in any way! We have to do three or four encores even though we only have like five songs!” She then notes that Marizza does, in fact, have her own email address, and wants to know who’s asking. Francisco is immediately suspicious and storms off, leaving Marcos to read through the rest of the email all, “I wonder if Mia added a kiss at the end!” What? Marcos is so weird.
At Casa Bustamante, Papa B is packing up to go put a stop to the Erreway tour. Ines is like, “Why don’t you just let them finish the tour and then destroy Pablo emotionally?” Papa B’s all, “Stop saying words, woman.” He then gets a call from the education minister’s advisor, who wants to pay Papa B a visit. Ines is like, “Maybe it’s just a social call!” and Papa B’s like, “Stop saying words, woman,” again, some more. He tells her to reschedule his trip to destroy Erreway, and Ines stomps off with his bags.
Back at Casa Colucci, Papa C emos over whether or not he and Miranda can really take down Papa B. Hilda and Sonia rag on him for being pessimistic, especially because then Miranda calls and tells Papa C that he’s gotten the ministry of education looking at Papa B. Everyone rejoices. Whatever, I’m sure that something will go hilariously awry and drag this plot out for another 20 episodes.
In Pablo’s room, Francisco has Javier by the collar and is demanding to know why he lied about Marizza’s email. Ha! Finally, someone has managed to put two and two together with Javier. It’s sad that it had to be Francisco, though. Javier snaps that he doesn’t owe Francisco an explanation, so Francisco punches him and storms out. God bless! I live for Javier getting hurt!
The kids show Miranda that they’ve cleaned up the classroom and have completed an art project that shows their understanding of feminism: it’s a painting of a woman breaking her chains! Truly, this one painting shows that the boys now understand how they perpetuate misogyny in their constant objectification of the girls around them. Sexism is over! Just kidding, Guido immediately start snarking that her chains may be broken, but she’s still going to do all the cooking and cleaning for the men in her life. Pilar punches him on the shoulder. Punch him in the face, Pilar! If Francisco can do it, so can you! Nevertheless, Miranda says that this is good enough for him and he lets them have the afternoon off.
The girls want to finally have their stupid soccer game, and so do I, because then at least this plot will be over. The boys protest that they’re too tired, and the girls are like, “Fine, we’ll just keep the money, then.” THAT’S WHAT THEY SHOULD HAVE DONE IN THE FIRST PLACE. Whatever. The boys agree to have the game today, and they all run off to get ready — except Sol, who the girls have kicked off the team (I mean, she didn’t want to play anyway?) and Feli, who has to grab something from her room. When she gets there, though, she’s all, “What are you doing here?” Cliffhanger!
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