Previously on Nancy Drew: The Haunting of Castle Malloy: Nancy Drew arrived in Ireland, and promptly crashed her car. Everyone seems to think this is the result of supernatural interference, instead of something Nancy does like every three books. Anyway, she’s here to be the maid of honor to Kyler Mallory, this girl she knew for like a month in high school. Kyler’s fiancé, Matt, has disappeared, and Kyler’s like, “Let’s not worry, this is totally normal! Whose fiancé doesn’t disappear right before the wedding?” Meanwhile, Matt’s friend, Kit, is also staying with us, and spends all his time making suspicious comments about having a crush on Kyler and wanting to develop Castle Malloy’s land. The castle also has a creepy caretaker, who thinks Matt’s been taken away by fairies. As you do.
So when you call Ned and Bess, every time you ask for a hint, they’ll be like, “Just ask the automated fortune teller in the library!” Thanks, guys. However, it costs tokens to ask it for a hint, so we’ll just go without. What we do need is to check the bin next to her, where we find another weight.
Back at the castle, we can check in with Kyler again. We ask why Alan Paine is the best man and not Kit, and Kyler shrugs that Kit just wanted it that way. Anyway, Alan, like Kyler, is sticking with the prank story and went back to London so Matt couldn’t make a fool of him. I bet when we find Matt and he finds out his best man abandoned him when he went missing, he’s gonna be pissed. Kyler gives us Alan’s number if we want to call him. And we totally do.
We ask Kyler about Matt’s luggage, and she swears it’s in the nursery. We’re like, “Well, you also think he’s just playing some elaborate joke, so maybe let’s not trust your judgment.” Just kidding, but the luggage definitely isn’t there now. She muses that maybe Donal moved it. Then we show her the broken glasses, and she says that they’re Matt’s — and he would never take them off, as he’s blind without them. She’s like, “He must really be committed to this joke!”
Having gotten the missing weights from downstairs, we can do this puzzle now. The goal is to get all three scales balanced. When that’s done, the drawer underneath will pop open we’ll get a tile. We’ll need that later.
Let’s go interrogate Kit some more. We ask why he didn’t want to the best man, but he gives a different explanation than Kyler: he says Matt thought it would be a good move, “politically”, to ask one of his coworkers to be best man. He shrugs that it’s not a big deal. I bet it is.
We ask if he’s ever been up to the tower, and he’s like, “…the stairs have been blown up, Nancy.” Everyone in this game must think Nancy’s really dumb. We tell him we saw light coming from it, and he’s like, “Ooooh, maybe it was the Good People come a-callin’…or maybe it was reflected moonlight, Nancy.” Well, you don’t have to be a dick about it, Kit.
In my grand tradition of doing everything in these games in the least efficient way possible, I went all the way back to the Screaming Banshee to call Alan, without doing anything else in the castle. We ask him if he saw anything ~spooky~ in the castle, and he remarks that the castle itself isn’t weird, but there was hella drama going down between its inhabitants. Say what? Alan tells us that the night before Matt disappeared, he and Kit had a fight — and coincidentally, Kit showed up the next day with a black eye. Hmmm. Then Matt and Kyler had a fight, and Alan was like, “This is way too much drama for me, call me when you guys are actually ready to get married. Peace out.”
So now we know that the door Kit walked into was actually named Matt. Let’s go lug ourselves all the way back to the castle and confront him about this. Kit’s all offended we called Alan Paine, and says that Alan doesn’t know either of them that well. He totally misunderstood their fight: Kit and Matt are besties; they punch each other in the face all the time! Ooookay. But what were they fighting about? Kit: “It was so inconsequential, I’ve already forgotten.” So inconsequential that Matt gave him a black eye over it? Kit is not a good liar.
Anyway, he then tries to get us off his case by giving us an errand. He’s supposed to be doing the seating chart for the wedding dinner, but he’d rather pawn it off onto us instead. Well, okay, let’s see here:
So it’s a logic puzzle, where you have to seat everyone according to the guidelines on the left. Kit won’t talk to us until it’s done, but it’s pretty easy, so whatever. When we’re done, Nancy’s like, “So are you gonna spill everything to me now?” and Kit’s like, “Oh wait! Here’s a clue I found!” Nancy, God love her, is distracted by this. Kit gives us a book called Brehon Law: Social Class at a Glance, and says he found it in Matt’s room. We’ll need it to solve a puzzle later, as we do with all things.
Let’s give Kit five minutes to get over his reluctance to tell Nancy Drew his entire life story. Upstairs, we ask Kyler about her and Matt’s fight, and she insists that that’s just how their relationship is. Their constant fighting wasn’t a sign of any problems whatsoever! Okay, Kyler. Anyway, having asking her that, let’s go back and harass Kit some more.
We can now ask Kit what he was really fighting with Matt about, and he tells us he tried to talk Matt and Kyler out of getting married so hastily. Someone else who thinks two 21-year-olds shouldn’t be getting married! Marry me, Kit. (I’m…kind of into his undone-tie, rolled-up-shirtsleeve, black-eye look. I’m not proud of myself, okay?) Anyway, it escalated into a fight, and Kit thinks that Matt left because his words hit too close to home. “So if I seem a little guilty to you, it’s because I am guilty. It’s my fault Matt walked out on Kyler.” Hmm.
We bring up that Donal ships Kit/Kyler like burning, and Kit’s like, “Whatever, he crazy.” He doesn’t think Donal’s crazy enough to have made Matt disappear, though. But! We do have proof that Kit and Kyler used to date, don’t we? Kit admits to it, but says it didn’t last. He’s the one who introduced her to Matt, and now Kit and Kyler are just friends. Fair enough. “You sure ask a lot of questions,” he notes. I can’t help it if I’m super invested in this drama, Kit! He recognizes Nancy, though, and says Kyler’s mentioned us: “You’re the girl who likes to play detective.” Wow, Kyler’s been going around telling everyone about Nancy and her hobbies, and Nancy’s never even mentioned her before this game. Get better friends, Kyler.
Finally, we can tell Kit about Kyler hearing Matt’s voice, and he says she must be going crazy, because Matt is gone. The third wheel doth protest too much, methinks.
Solving the weight puzzle gave us a tile, which we can use on this puzzle here. It’s outside, on one of the columns at the end of the castle driveway. It’s a sliding puzzle, and when it’s completed, we can put our tile in the blank spot. That’ll give us a plate for the printing press. What’s the plate doing behind a sliding puzzle? Nobody knows. I mean, I guess they haven’t had to use the press in about a hundred years, so fair enough.
Apparently I then went around solving the minor puzzles in the various areas around the castle. This is the garden, where there are a bunch of leprechaun statues. This is a good place for clues, as Kit told us earlier that Donal caught Matt messing with the statues (and yelled at him for getting his dirty English hands all over the leprechauns). Anyway, so this puzzle is meant to be solved using the Brehon Law book Kit gave us; the explanations of each medieval Irish social class are accompanied by a shamrock design. Coincidentally, those same shamrocks appear on these leprechauns, so you arrange them according to the first letter of each explanation (they all begin with L, R, F, B; obviously corresponding to left, right, front, or back).
With that done, some shrubbery is brushed aside, and we find the crow’s nest. It’s been hoarding a few gems (which we’ll need), and another creepy doll. Wow, this crow is really dextrous.
The doll is of…Kyler? I mean, I don’t know what kind of material our culprit has on hand, but I think they could’ve managed to stitch a pony onto the shirt if it was meant to be Nancy.
Alrighty. So in the nursery, there’s a display with a bunch of gems. Four were missing, stolen by the crow. We found one in the nursery earlier, and the other three outside by the leprechauns. So we put them back into their slots, and click on them in the order of the rainbow (ROYGBIV). When we do, the fireplace pulls back to reveal a hidden passageway. Woo! This is relatively early in the game to be finding one, isn’t it? Usually the start to secret passage time is something like two-thirds of the game. Well, whatever. We find a hidden room behind the fireplace, where we pick up a random board, as well as a set of rock symbols.
After all, it’s not like any of these rock formations could ever be moved in any way. So we’ve found some clues, let’s head back out…
Dude! The fuck! The creepy crow flies directly at us, perhaps pissed that we’ve been stealing its dolls. It worked hard on those, you know!
We turn to the window, where we see our mysterious banshee. “Oh my God, it’s Matt!” Kyler says. No, I’m just kidding. She actually screams in horror, but really, would you have been surprised?
We automatically cut to Kyler, who saw the banshee from the library. She’s freaked out, but says there must be a rational explanation, and asks us to investigate. Uh, Kyler, I’ve already got my hands full with this whole Matt thing. Why don’t you investigate the banshee? Just kidding, Kyler would rather park her butt in the library and read about her castle-owning family history. I bet Matt will be really happy to find that out.
We can go talk to Kit about the banshee, too. He’s all like, “It was probably Matt.” Dammit, Kit. I retract my offer of marriage.
You know what, let’s just talk to everyone about the banshee, since after this, we’re gonna have to venture into the bog and shit, and we could be gone for a while. Anyway, Donal’s still nursing his “juice”, and we can ask him about the banshee, too. He tells us that someone at Castle Malloy is definitely, 100%, most certainly gonna die. Donal doesn’t realize he’s in an E-rated game.
Secondly, has he ever tried to walk across the bog? Donal’s like, “Nobody has ever tried to cross the bog! It’s completely impossible!” I bet it’s not. He mentions that there’s long been a rumor of a crazy old woman living in a hut deep in the bog, but it’s just a tall tale. I bet it’s not.
Since we’re down at the Screaming Banshee, I’m gonna call everyone again. There’s a weird bit with Ned, where he claims to still be at the party, but Nancy notes a suspicious lack of party-like noises. When we call Bess and George, they inform us that some chick in a bikini has been hitting on him all night, so he’s hiding out inside the house. Slight references to alcohol, shirtless men, two-piece swimwear, and romantic drama? This game is positively scandalous, for Nancy Drew. We update them on everything we learned from Alan Paine earlier, but they don’t have to much to say. You know, our phone contacts are always slightly behind the events of the game whenever we call; we can’t mention the banshee at all to them.
Back to the castle. So I actually tried to go into the bog when we first got here, and it promptly killed me. Now, though, we have that wooden plank we found in the nursery, so we can just walk across. I can’t believe the bog was defeated by a stick of wood. And Donal’s trying to tell us that nobody thought of this in the past 50 years?
As we walk through the bog, we find a bunch of stones that just happen to look exactly like the ones on our cheat sheet. So we just follow the instructions, and that’ll take us to…
…this house here. Hmm, is this the hut that Donal said didn’t exist? Bite me, Donal. Anyway, it’s the middle of the night, we’re alone in the bog, we have no idea who could possibly be in that house…let’s just barge right in, shall we?
We have lots of clues in this here creepy hut! There’s a nasty-ass cage with a bunch of bugs buzzing around it, but Nancy will note that we need to get in there somehow. Ew, Nancy.
We find a bunch of doll-making supplies, and another chart for the dollhouse. Next to the doll stuff is a box, but it’s locked. There’s also a bunch of various herbs lined up against the walls, and we find a book listing the remedies they can be used for. One of them is “Bug Bane,” which kills bugs. So we can mix the herbs to make that and kill the insects around the cage, leaving our way clear to grab whatever’s inside.
It’s…some kind of lens? Whatever. I guess we need it.
On our way out, we pass a wicker basket, which we can grab…something out of. Nancy won’t say what it is, and it takes us a few more puzzles to figure out, but I’ll tell you right now it is a jetpack. And I’m sorry to say it, but the second we put that thing on, the game becomes irrevocably stupid. We’re not there yet, though, so let’s enjoy a few more hours of this game being enjoyable and effectively creepy.
With the lens, we can now see that there are a bunch of symbols in the center of the Celtic crosses. The crosses all have the number of a year on them. The symbols match the ones on the stones of the wall, so now we know to press the stones that have the same symbols as the crosses, in the order of oldest year to latest (1801, 1845, 1916).
The wall comes down, and now we can go wandering around even more of the castle grounds. I bet they’re a mess, since nobody’s been able to get around that wall. Nancy Drew would be a way better groundskeeper than Donal.
Where are we going? I have no fucking idea. We wander aimlessly around the grounds until we come across some standing stones. They have mysterious symbols on them and shit.
We can’t do jack with them right now, so let’s move on. We wander around and find a barn, which we’ll have to use later. There’s a gear lying on the porch, which is the last one we need for a puzzle (the other one was in the nursery). And! And and and!
We trip over this piece of paper here, which looks like a plan to develop the Castle Malloy site. Kit!!! *shakes fist* Also, I like how he calls the standing stones “weird stones.” Donal would be so disappointed.
Let’s go confront Kit. Actually, I was afraid that asking him about the sketch would make him kick us out or something, so we ask him about the hut in the bog first. Kit’s like, “You went out into the bog? Nobody’s ever come back from there alive!” Maybe you’re all just weak, Kit. Anyway, we ask him about his sketch, and he says he was just messing around. Hmm. “Great, so it’s okay if I keep this,” Nancy says. Heh.
“You have a lead?” Kyler asks, the second we rock up to her. Maybe we would have one if you got off your butt and did something, Kyler. We show her Kit’s drawing, and she’s all, “This looks like Castle Malloy!” Duh, he labeled it, Kyler. She says she didn’t ask him to do this, and she doubts Matt would’ve. Maybe he did it as a prank, Kyler! No? We’re finally moving on from that? Anyway, Kit suddenly looks quite suspicious.
Kyler now has another chore for us, because of course she does. She’s all superstitious now, and wants to put some anti-banshee herbs in her bouquet. Fine, whatever. I’m started to think getting called all the way out here just to wander around a drafty castle and do chores is a bit of a rip. There better be an open bar at this wedding.
But first, let’s just ask Donal about all these shenanigans. It’d be funny if he got progressively easier to talk to on account of him being wasted on “juice.” Anyway, he tells us that the writing on the “weird stones” is Ogham, and he even bought a book on the topic, but he still can’t figure out what the pillars are meant to be. Ooh, we could totally figure out what those pillars are, if Donal will just lend us his book! Pick us, pick us!
“Sorry to say, I’m not in a lendin’ mood at the moment.” Sigh. Of course. Okay, what do we have to do for Donal?
Donal’s feeling low on account of the fact that the drummer in the pub band is sick, and now he can’t listen to his favorite “drum music.” I’m not sure hearing Nancy Drew fuck up his favorite songs will make him feel better, but whatever. So anyway, colored balls will go down the line at the top of the screen, and once they reach the circle at the end, we have to hit the corresponding color on the drum. It’s not too hard. Once we’re done, Donal will give us the book.
Success!
Now to find Kyler’s herbs. They’re scattered all over the various locations on the castle grounds; we can find a couple of them in the bog and the hut, and the others are growing around the fairy ring, standing stones, etc. When we have all of them, we head back to the castle to give them to Kyler.
We walk into her having a huge argument with Kit. Drama!!! Let’s listen, shall we? Kyler accuses Kit of being after the land, and he’s like, “I’m not after your huge tracts of land!” and she’s like, “Then what are you after?” OOOOH. Kit tries to tell Kyler that Matt’s gone, and she’s like, “Maybe you made him leave! Did you tell him it wasn’t over between us? Because it is MOST DEFINITELY OVER.” OH SNAP! I love this conversation. It’s so gloriously soapy and dramatic. Nancy Drew games generally relegate the romance to the historical aspect of a case (like Lizzie Applegate and Frances Humber), but frankly it’s a lot more fun when the drama is going on between the suspects. The subtitles switch to “*muffled voices*” at this point, but if you listen you can still hear snatches of conversation: Kyler tells Kit to stop being so negative (is he being a…Negative Nancy? A HA HA); Matt is always playing jokes on her. Then it fades out a bit, then Kit says something about Kyler being “classier” than Matt’s exes (what?), and how Matt is more uptight than she is (also what? She’s the one convinced that her disappearing boyfriend is a prank). It doesn’t make a lot of sense, since we’re not really meant to hear anything beyond the subtitled conversation, but it’s still some interesting stuff.
Deciding for once in her life not to barge in on a sensitive situation, Nancy takes the opportunity to poke around Kit’s area. And under his bed we find Matt’s missing luggage! What you up to, Kit?
We can’t talk to Kyler about the conversation; we just fork over her flowers, and we tell her that Kit has Matt’s luggage. Kyler is briefly bothered by this: “Why would Kit do a thing like that?” Then she’s like, “Whatever.” She’s all happy that this means that Matt is still around here somewhere.
Since we found the last gear outside, we can do this puzzle that’s in the library. When we complete it, we get another dollhouse puzzle. Okay, whatever.
The dollhouse thing is boring, and I don’t think we have all the dolls we need just yet. Let’s go harass Kit instead. So Kit, what was Matt’s luggage doing under the cots? Kit’s all shocked: “Oh my gosh…He didn’t go back to London — he’s been here the whole time! Kyler was right. Oh my gosh.” I keep reading that in the voice of my best friend when we were 13. OMG, guys! Anyway, he denies all knowledge of how the luggage came to be under the cots. Nancy notes that he sounds a little disappointed (and somewhat like a preteen girl), and Kit says that he still thinks that Matt and Kyler are making a mistake, so yeah, he’s a little disappointed that Matt hadn’t skipped out on her. Hmm, or is he disappointed because he still likes Kyler? Kit admits that he does, but he isn’t sure what to do about it yet. I can’t believe we were robbed of a scene of Kit dramatically stopping the wedding.
I’m not going to pretend to understand the logic behind this, but we need to get one of the dolls by playing the games down at the pub. It makes no sense because the dolls are being made by the mysterious banshee, who’s pretty much confined to the castle grounds. I mean, you’d think someone would notice her popping in for a drink. But whatever, we win the darts game, and get a doll for our efforts.
Since we’re down here, let’s talk to Donal. We tell him about finding Matt’s luggage and he’s like, “‘Twas I who put them there!” No way! Why would you do that, Donal? Donal tells us that Matt was like, “Hey, nobody’s using this nursery, and in fact the entire family who owned this castle has been dead for 50 years, maybe I could stay in it.” And Donal was all like, “THE NURSERY IS FIONA’S!!!!” So Donal moved his bags, trying to force him out of the room — but then of course Matt disappeared, taking care of Donal’s problem for him. He needles Nancy for being “good at finding things” (is Nancy a Hufflepuff?), and suggests that she can put her finding skills to use by rounding up all the sheep on the castle property so that Donal can shear them. I’ll give him a pass on this chore; presumably he’s so drunk he’s just going to be tottering around in the dark trying to hug the sheep or something. He says we need to whistle for the sheep, and Nancy’s like, “But…I don’t have a whistle.” “Were you not just braggin’ less than a minute ago about how good you are at finding things?” Donal asks. Hee. He got Nancy there, I must say.
Anyway, we can win the whistle by playing one of the arcade games, called Difference Detective. It’s one of those spot-the-difference games, which I am absolutely crap at. Observe:
THIS IS SOME BULLSHIT.
I finally win a round of this game and get the whistle. We then have to go back to the castle and round up the sheep. It’s bit of a pain in the ass — mostly because every time you get close to rounding up all the sheep, one or two of them escape. Eventually, we get all the sheep locked in the sheep pen. With that chore out of the way, we can get back to solving our mystery.
Up next: I blow myself up, a lot. Also: Jetpack Nancy Drew. I think we should all take some inspiration from Donal and start drinking.
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