Previously on Rebelde Way: Everyone was terrible to each other. Wait, that could describe any episode of Rebelde Way at any given time. Let’s elaborate: Feli worked up the nerve to ask Mia to let her dance in the auditions. Mia, in a distinct lapse of her usual awesomeness, punked out and let Vico bully Feli out of the group for good. Pablo proved to Tomás, via a game of pool, that they are never ever getting back together. Guido descended to new levels of grossness and called Vico a wh*re in the school paper, like the classy guy he is.
Opening narration: Life is a road. Sometimes it’s nice, and sometimes it’s not. Eh, I can’t really make fun of this one, it’s pretty straightforward and boring.
Some hallway. Vico tells Mia that she’s going to destroy whoever is responsible for the newspaper. Mia tells her not to worry about it — nobody will pay any attention. She knows this because one time a girl said that her Armani boots weren’t real, but that rumor blew over. “I totally understand injustice!” I think I’ve mentioned this, but I love Mia because she’s basically Cher from Clueless. Unfortunately for Vico, the second they walk into the courtyard, some guys start ganging up on her and asking if she gives discounts. That’s actually really gross.
Pablo and Guido roll up, and Pablo muses on how he never gave Guido a chance. “Maybe it was Tomás’s fault,” Pablo says. Guido agrees: “He was probably intimidated by two capos like us.” I’m starting to think these two deserve each other. Anyway, they cackle over getting Vico in trouble. I wouldn’t be so confident if I were them. I mean, Pablo hasn’t proven himself to be particularly adept at getting his classmates kicked out in the past.
Meanwhile, Luna is masquerading as Marizza at her therapy session. The psychologist is all confused because Luna is polite and actually somewhat well-adjusted, for this school anyway. Back in the room, Luna chirps that therapy’s not really that bad, and Marizza’s like, “Oh good, you can continue pretending to be me for the rest of the term, then!” She hops off to go find Nacho before Luna can protest, and runs into Marcos in the hall. He tries to talk to her about the whole Mansilla thing, but Marizza blows him off. She finds Nacho outside, bizarrely not in his Little Lord Fauntleroy outfit anymore. He tells Marizza that he’s off to pick up the costumes from Sonia, but first, he’s going to buy a snack. This whole thing is just a set-up for Pablo to bust Marizza talking to Nacho. Nacho scampers before Pablo can actually see him, as always. Then Gloria busts Pablo and Marizza for being out of the dorms after hours. Marizza covers by kissing Pablo. Finally! But what about Marcos?
Mia’s room. Vico has moved past the anger stage and into a mental breakdown, and Mia’s like, “Oh pfft, just stop thinking about your problems and focus on mine!” Oh, Mia. Then Gloria barges in, the way teachers in this school are wont to do, and tells Vico that the principal wants to see her. “What’s wrong? Do you need a doctor?” she snides at Vico. Then she smugly tells them that Feli asked for transfer application. She’s way too invested in their drama. Then again, very little actual administrating seems to go on at this school, so it’s not like Gloria has anything better to do.
The next day, I guess. Nico plays sick to get out of leaving the room and facing ~the Society~, although given how people just waltz in and out of the rooms here, I feel like he’d be safer sticking with Manuel and Marcos. But whatever. Manuel figures out that Nico is a lying liar, and berates him for not going to school like a Real Man. Nico’s like, au contraire, you’re the one who’s always lying around here! This shuts Manuel up pretty quick. Once he leaves, someone else knocks at the door, and Nico opens it like a dumbass. Of course it’s the Society, and they start kicking the crap out of him. I mean, I feel bad for Nico, but that was just stupid. They start messing up his stuff and throwing his folders around. “NOT MY HOMEWORK!” Nico wails.
Classroom. Marizza not-so-accidentally lets it slip to Pablo’s friends that they made out. I mean, this can only be good for Pablo and his tarnished reputation, but he threatens that he totally knows she was talking to someone the other night, and it was totally the same kid who threw an acorn at him, and he is totally going to bust her. One day. Eventually. Like, fifty episodes from now, maybe.
Manuel catches up to Mia and needles her about being mean to Feli. Mia’s been leaving messages on Feli’s phone, but she’s not talking to her. So like…is Feli just skipping class now? Did she get her parents to take her home? It’s not clear. Anyway, he tells her that it’s a pity he won’t be able to tell Feli that Mia feels bad about being a dick to her, but Mia’s too proud to apologize through Manuel. Manuel swans off, all pleased that Mia and Feli are fighting.
In Dunoff’s office, he’s busy victim-blaming Vico and threatening her with expulsion for…having a rumor spread about her? Jesus Christ, Dunoff. Bizarrely, she tells him that it’s not true, and he’s like, “Well, whoever wrote this seems to know all the facts!” I mean, Dunoff, anyone can make a story up. And even if it is true, they can’t prove it, not to mention this is plain bullying. But are we surprised Dunoff is being a dick about this? He’s like, “I don’t really want to be bothered with being good at my job. You should probably just transfer.”
Classroom. Guido takes over Tomás’s old desk. Tomás comes in and sadly moves his stuff to the desk next to Pilar. You know, it occurs to me for all my chalking it up to Tomás being dumb as a post, the show is never really clear on why he decides to go along with Vico’s machinations. Did he secretly like her? Did he secretly want to fuck with Pablo? Is his mind really just that weak? I guess we’ll never know! Anyway, Marizza observes this playby and says she wants to punch Pablo. “I feel bad for him, we don’t know what his home life is like,” Luna says. It occurs to me that Marizza’s like the only person in this entire school that doesn’t know about Pablo’s abusive dad at this point. Keep up with the times, Marizza!
Anyway, the new history teacher — “Hilda” — comes in, and she’s a very librarian-esque older lady. The rando who introduces her says that she just came back from “finishing her license.” What is with all these teachers waltzing in like two weeks late to their jobs? Whatever. She tells them all that she doesn’t tolerate any malarkey. A fair warning, especially with these kids. Marizza is not pleased.
In his office, Dunoff evils to someone on the phone that he’s found a place for their nephew in the 10th grade. All he had to do was unfairly kick someone else out! Principaling is super easy!
In the hallway, Mia is trying to take a selfie to send to Feli. Ha! I love how she thinks the solution to this problem is send Feli a card with her own face on it.
Vico comes up and tells Mia that she’s feeling really down, and Mia’s like, “I totally feel you! I have to ask Manuel to give this card to Feli and it’s soooo hard.” Oh, Mia. Why can’t she just mail the card? Or drive by Feli’s house? Whatever. Vico’s like, “I’m literally about to get expelled from this school” and Mia’s like, “Oh, look, there’s Manuel, BYE.” OH, MIA. She asks Manuel to give the card to Feli, and he’s like, “No. Bye.” Heh.
Marcos runs into Pablo and his friends in the hall, and tells them that he’s looking for Marizza. Pablo ominouses that he is too, and they head off together. Guido’s like, “This is an excellent time to go hit on Mia!” She laments to him that things are going downhill at Elite Way, and he insinuates himself into her good graces by stroking her ego. “Nobody at this school can ignore who you are and what you represent!” She sniffles and lets him hold her. Oh, Mia.
Manuel’s room. He comes in to see Nico being emo, and awkwardly apologizes for fighting with him that morning. Nico tells him to go away, but Manuel is hella nosy and flips him over to see the bruises on his face. “They beat me up,” Nico monotones. “WHO?” Manuel asks. Oh my God, Manuel. Nico just stares at him, as he should.
Some classroom. Marizza is explaining the dance routine to her group when Marcos rolls up and asks if they’re going to get together to work on their science project. Marizza’s like, “Yeah, no can do. Why don’t we just fail and you can tell the teacher it was my fault?” Marcos flips out at the thought of getting an F, and Marizza’s like, “Fail a class for once in your life! Be ~REBELDE~” He asks why she chose him as her partner, and she tells him that he may not be super good-looking (lol), but he’s pretty cool, and she kisses him on the cheek. Marcos is all twitterpated. Pablo sees the whole thing and is perturbed. Wait, I thought Marcos and Pablo had gone off to look for Marizza together?
Dance room. Hey, what happened to the gym? I guess it just disappeared into the ether. This school is like Hogwarts that way. Anyway, Vico is too distraught to dance and runs away. Nevertheless, Mia carries on pretty well until Feli comes in. Mia catches sight of her and falls flat on her face. The dance teacher judgmentally makes a note on her clipboard.
When we come back from the commercial break, it’s time for Marizza’s dance. They do a mildly creative thing with a hospital bed and scrubs. The whole thing is whatever. Marizza’s obviously going to win, and I can save us all some time and say that she does. I’m not super clear on what this means. Do Mia and her friends have to audition to be on Marizza’s team now? Did the dance teacher not learn her lesson about letting the students run the dance squad? Oh whatever, who cares.
Back in Manuel’s room, he tells Nico that if Nico doesn’t want to talk about it, he’ll respect that. Then, two seconds later: “But if you DID tell me who they were, we could totally get revenge!” Oh, Manuel. Nico says he didn’t see their faces, and Manuel snipes that it’s so typical of Pablo and his friends to attack from behind. Nico finally tells Manuel that it was the Society who jumped him. Manuel’s all shocked, like it wasn’t the most obvious thing in the world. Nico and Manuel argue a bit over whether or not they should get revenge. “Don’t they realize that by attacking you, they’ve offended ME?” Manuel asks. Heh. He and Mia are so made for each other. Manuel yells at Nico that they have to be united against the Society, but Nico just cries that he’s scared. Marcos pokes his head in and eavesdrops on them, even though I’m sure he’s overheard this same discussion between them about eighty times. Manuel reveals that Papa Aguirre shot himself and storms off, and Marcos scampers.
“Manuel wants to confront the Society! Nico doesn’t! This is a fascinating conversation that I’ve definitely never heard before!”
The not-library. Pablo rolls up to hang out with Guido, and Guido says he’s copying a Neruda poem to give to Mia. Pablo laughs at him, but Guido says that he’s figured her out: all he has to do is crush her self-esteem and make her think she can’t do any better, and she’ll be his girlfriend! What’s more romantic than bullying someone into a relationship? Mia comes in right then, but she’s too pissed to notice Guido’s pick up artist methods this time. She tells Pablo and Guido that the dance auditions are over and storms off. “Did I fail as a poet?” Guido wonders. I mean, yeah, you just copied a Neruda poem out of a book. I wouldn’t call that success, for sure. Pablo tells him that they have to go find Marizza immediately — she’s supposedly dating Marcos now, but Pablo is convinced something’s up, seeing as Marizza was putting the mack on him like five scenes ago.
In the gym, Marizza and her group celebrate their win. Marizza starts packing up their snacks and soda and tells Lujan she’s going to sneak some to Nacho. Guido follows her out to the sad trailer, but before he can go again, Lujan comes out of absolutely nowhere and throws Guido to the ground. Lujan’s been lacking in awesomeness lately, so I support her beating up Guido, but I have no idea where she came from. Anyway, Guido’s like, “What’s your little friend doing in there?” and Lujan derps, “What friend?” Guido’s like, “The one person in this entire school you spend time with, duh.” Lujan has to admit that’s true. Then we cut away before she can tell Guido who Marizza’s with. Suspense! I guess.
Mia’s room. Feli is being really nice to Vico, which is weird because Vico was the one who said Feli was too fat to be in the dance group, but okay. Mia comes in to wail at them about how they’re not really her friends, and then she runs upstairs to angst by herself. Feli and Vico are just like, “Whatever”, which is fair enough. Then Pilar comes in and asks Vico if it’s true that she’s being expelled (tactful!). “WHAT?” Mia shrieks. Heh. Somehow, Vico refrains from being like, “You’d have known that if you’d actually been listening when I told you.” Anyway, Mia gets over herself and tells them that they have to put their heads together and come up with a way to keep Vico in school. Mia’s plan: “So Dunoff is kicking you out of the newspaper, right? And he can do it because you’re on scholarship, right? But I’m not, right?” Vico’s like, “…I’m not seeing a plan here.” Mia squeals and says that she’ll just get her very rich and famous father to complain to the higher-ups that someone’s spreading nasty rumors via the paper and that Dunoff isn’t trying to stop it. Problem solved! I’m pleased Mia is using her powers for good, but I’m also disappointed that she’s not going to girl-detective this shit out. She could totally bust Pilar, and I bet Mia wouldn’t forget it after five minutes like Guido did. Mia runs off to put her plan into motion, and Vico gushes that she’s the best friend ever. “Yup, there’s nothing like having Mia as your best friend,” Feli says dryly. Uh-oh, I’m guessing not all is forgiven there.
Some hallway. Guido excitedly tells Pablo that Lujan spilled everything to him — Marizza’s meeting with a bunch of psychics, trying to get “some guys” kicked out of school with witchcraft. Guido’s taking this very seriously (“Those people have a lot of power!”), and Pablo’s like, “Are you stupid? Lujan was lying to you, duh,” but Guido says that he saw Marcos in the yard while Marizza was in the trailer, ergo, they couldn’t have been together. Guido’s like, “If you’re obsessed with Marizza that’s your bag, but don’t go messing with brujería, man.” Then they get into an argument over whether or not witches are real. It’s so random and stupid that I kind of love them for it, even Guido.
Mia catches up to Feli in the lounge and says they have to talk. Feli snips that she came back to school for Manuel, not for Mia. She hits Mia with a reason you suck speech, and tells her that they’re not friends and Feli doesn’t give a fuck about her anymore. It is ICE COLD. And kind of awesome. Also, some genuinely decent acting from Angeles Balbiani, which is a rarity for this show. She storms off and leaves Mia standing there.
In the sad trailer, Nacho hears someone at the door and yells, “Marizza, have you brought me more food?” Nice going, kid. Of course it’s not Marizza. It’s Pablo, who has managed to bust Nacho by coming to the trailer himself, which is what he should’ve just done in the first place.
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