Previously on Rebelde Way: Did Manuel, a boy we’ve known for over a year now, arrange his own traumatic kidnapping and near-death experience to collect a ransom from his girlfriend, whose father already gives him money from the vast family fortune on the regular? We just don’t know! Let’s doubt him for no reason other than to cause drama!
Mia had a brief flash of Girl Detective insight and realized that there’s no way Manuel had time to transport the ransom money in between being kidnapped, rescued, and going back to Elite Way to make out with Mia some more. Everyone’s like, “But like, maybe he did.” Seriously, have any of them even met Manuel? He got invited right into Papa C’s house and still couldn’t carry out his revenge properly. Plans are not his forte.
So now apparently the candidates have to give speeches, which Pablo is now working on. As ever, Guido only wants to talk about how many girls he’s bringing to the yard. I mean, it’s only one girl, and Guido’s not really into her anyway — he’s like, “Yeah, she’s not that cute, and she’s kind of boring.” But she likes Guido, and honestly, that’s a pretty big obstacle to clear in the first place. Then Pablo tells Guido that her dad is in the German car import industry — how can Pablo possibly know this? — and Guido’s like, “Omg, she’s dumb enough to like me, and I can use her to get material goods? A total win!”
They are still, for some reason, constantly filming only half of Pablo’s face in close-ups. What is up with that? Is it some kind of deep meta film thing I am not getting? A metaphor for how this election is turning Pablo into half the man he used to be? I really don’t know.
Dunoff crosses all professional boundaries and tells Gloria that he’s been like, super mega horny lately. Gloria’s like, “Well, hey, if you need some help with that…” but Dunoff’s going to try going to the doctor first. Fair enough. Gloria invites him over to her house — to help him ~relax~, you know — and says she’ll make him Japanese food, which is apparently her specialty. “Japanese?” Dunoff says. “Yup!” Gloria chirps, PULLING BACK HER EYES TO MAKE THEM LOOK SLANTY. What the fuck!
She’s racist, and she’s trying to get into Dunoff’s pants. Are there no depths Gloria won’t sink to?
Marizza and Lujan try to plan out PILAS’s speech, as Guido walks around the courtyard with a megaphone, broadcasting Fuerza Motriz’s slogans. I hate to say it, but Pablo is really running the better campaign. Oh, God, he’s gonna win and then start a nuclear war with North Korea. Marizza is upset that she can’t come up with anything good for her speech, and Lujan’s like, “Yeah, I prefer using fists instead of words, so…tough luck.” Sonia rolls up to gush to Marizza about landing Colucci’s campaign — she’s going to be a top model, the next Naomi Campbell, except not as old or as black. What? There’s so much drive-by racism in this episode.
From across the courtyard, Sol’s starfucker radar goes off. She runs up to introduce herself and tell Sonia about her model aspirations. Always supportive of girls being brainwashed by traditional femininity, Sonia gushes that Sol would be an awesome model, and maybe she could use her connections to get her work. Marizza uses this to pin Sol: she catches up with her later, and Marizza tells Sol that she’ll only let Sonia talk to her if Sol joins PILAS. Sol agrees.
Mia cries to Feli and Vico some more about Manuel. They’re just like, “Yeah…this sucks, I guess.” The lawyer comes by and tells Mia that Manuel’s fired him, because he’s just…gonna accept his jail sentence, I guess. Mia bleats over and over that she JUST CAN’T BELIEVE IT! Ohhh boy, I usually love Mia and I don’t mind Luisana Lopilato by extension, but asking her to do all this dramatic heavy lifting was a big mistake. She’s very naturally cute and sweet, and they really should just stick to letting her be funny and charming instead of trying to make her act. Feli and Vico tell her that if she can’t figure out what to do, they should just get Marizza to help — she can fix anything, after all. Usually by brute force, but whatever.
Feli’s hair is looking very cute in this episode, by the by.
Tomás is being all emo about his breakup with Pablo, still. Ana keeps trying to cheer him up, for some reason. Is Tomás paying Ana to be his therapist or something? She finally snaps that he should stop worrying about everything else in his life, and just worry about his shitty grades. I mean, it’s not like Tomás can make his dumb ass any smarter, so it’s probably for the best that he’s just focusing on things he can control.
Pilar comes into the cafeteria and finds Pablo working on his speech. She has a conversation with half of Pablo’s face (again), and he blackmails her into joining Fuerza Motriz. After Pilar leaves, Papa B shows up, and Pablo asks him to look over his debate points. Papa B agrees, and says he’ll hang around for a while, too. Pablo is sweetly and horribly excited that his dad is willing to help him. Then he calls one of his dad’s flunkies, who has nothing better to do than help Pablo with his high school election. The flunky tells Pablo that the pamphlets didn’t cost 400 pesos, which clues Pablo in that Guido was fucking with him.
In history class, they’re apparently now studying the Congress of Vienna. I’m gonna guess that 3rd year was Argentinian history, and now they’re doing…world history? Who the hell knows. One of the kids puts his hand up and asks her to go more slowly, and Hilda lectures him that in college, professors aren’t going to slow down for you. Ah, I see the experience of high school teachers lying about the cruelty of college is universal.
Guido’s not paying attention, and he drifts off into a dream sequence set to a truly awful cover of “What a Wonderful World.” A bunch of girls are dressed as sexy playing cards (next year’s Halloween costume!), and they dance up on Guido as he plays cards with some guys, eventually stripping him and taking his money? It makes about as much sense as any of the other dance sequences, i.e. none.
Dunoff goes to see a doctor, who gives him some pills to help kill his boner. I predict shenanigans in 3, 2, 1…
After class, Pablo asks Guido for a list of their campaign expenses, just, you know, so he can see how much everything’s costing. Guido and his embezzling ways are like, “Gulp.” He BSes once more that the pamphlets cost 400 pesos, and half of Pablo’s face is suspicious. Stop doing that, show!
Sol goes to the cafeteria and runs into Papa B. She charms him with her gold-digging ways, and when she asks to see Pablo’s speech, Papa B happily hands it over. Man. Played by a 16-year-old. Papa B is really losing his touch. When Pablo finds out that Sol and Papa B have been talking, he oddly flips out, because…he wanted to tell Papa B about Sol himself? I don’t know. Papa B still stops him to be like, “A+ trophy wife-finding!”, so it’s not like Pablo missed out on a bragging opportunity.
Sol takes her copy of Pablo’s speech and hands it over to Marizza. Marizza’s all appalled that Pablo actually has like, good ideas and stuff, and freaks out that she doesn’t know how to beat him. This show, once so heavy on the sanctimony, is really throwing me for a loop with all this fuzzy morality. I mean, Marizza is clearly the person the show wants us to like more — yet she’s not great at this whole campaigning thing at all, has to resort to cheating, and doesn’t seem like she’d make a good president. Pablo is falling all over himself to please his corrupt father and blackmailing people to join his party, but actually seems like he might be a decent president at the end of the day. Show! You’re confusing me with your attempts to be mature about these characters and their motivations!
Mia comes in and tries to get Marizza to help with Manuel, but Marizza’s too busy freaking out over her speech, and she kicks Mia out.
Pablo apologizes to Sol, as he yelled at her for introducing herself to Papa B without his permission. He says he’s sad because yet another friend has betrayed him. Speaking of whom! Guido rolls in, totally oblivious to Pablo’s mood, and starts babbling that they should throw a party. Pablo is passive-aggressive and doesn’t say a word about being mad at him. Sol’s like, “Uh, so are you pissed at him or not?”, and once again, half of Pablo’s face evils that he’s going to wait a bit and then serve his revenge cold.
Mia decides that she’s just going to storm on out of school and see Manuel in jail. Gloria tries to stop her, even though you’d think she’d know by now that no power on earth can stop these kids from doing whatever the hell they want. On her way out, Blas catches up to her, and in the moments he wastes dicking her around — go AWAY, Blas — Dunoff catches them. Nice going, Blas. Luckily for them, though, Dunoff’s new anti-boner pills make him hella sleepy, and Blas shuffles him off to his office.
We don’t see Mia escape, but she’s missing from literature class, so I’m guessing she does. Carmen makes a snide remark that Crooked Manuel is also missing, and Francisco snarks, “What’s missing is proof that Manuel is guilty.” Ah, dorky, sanctimonious one-liners. Francisco could be a Nancy Drew character. Carmen changes the subject: she hopes that Tomás has his homework today, to make up for that pathetic, regrettable excuse for a paper he turned into her. HEE! Carmen is a dick, but that was a burn. Luckily for Tomás, Ana sails in and hands his homework in for him. I swear to God, doesn’t Ana have a job? Hobbies? Is she just a robot whose only imperative is to validate Tomás? I have questions.
Tomás is all pleased to be able to hand his homework in. Across the room, Belen gives Fernanda a hand signal that I’m assuming means, “He’s fucking his way to the top,” but I really don’t know.
Belen, Fernanda, and Pilar all make eye contact. Carmen then switches to needling Marizza, who’s working on her speech instead of paying attention. She’s like, “If you can’t concentrate, then get out of my class,” and Marizza’s like, “Cool, see you later.” Heh. Pablo looks really suspiciously over at her desk, but then he doesn’t steal her speech, so I don’t see the point of that.
Feli volunteers to pass back homework, and slips outside to read Marizza the riot act. She points out that Manuel’s in jail, which is slightly more serious than a student election, and Marizza shot down Mia when she asked for help. “Welcome to the real world,” Feli snaps before storming off. That was pretty awesome, by Feli’s standards.
Pilar tells Lujan and Laura that she wants to leave PILAS. Lujan’s like, “You can check out, but you can never leave!” and threatens to get her violence on, as usual. For her part, Pilar can’t think of a good excuse for why she wants to leave, and merely derps that she just like, wants to, you know. That’s not suspicious at all. They decide to recruit Marcos instead, and he’s not good at writing speeches, at all. “I don’t understand politics!” he bleats. What? He knows advanced chemistry, but the concept of “two teenagers get into a mud-slinging competition with the ultimate goal of ruling the school with an iron fist” is too hard for him to grasp?
Marcos quickly loses his patience with Lujan constantly blowing her top at him over his non-commitment to Marizza Motion, and they argue. He’s being a bit of a dick, but on the other hand, I don’t know who thought it was a good idea to boil Lujan’s personality down to “completely clingy and insane” this season.
Mia goes to see Manuel at the jail, but Manuel’s being a passive-aggressive dick and refuses to see her. She’s like, “But I have proof of his innocence!” and I guess Manuel’s like, so hurt that he’s just gonna ignore that and let himself go to jail for twenty years. Mia plants herself in the waiting room and says she won’t leave until she sees Manuel.
Guido gives Augustina a necklace and asks her to come to Pablo’s campaign party. She agrees, and he leaves. Then Bianca and Lola decide to hang out with Augustina, for some reason. Lola needles Augustina about dating Guido, and Augustina…tells them Guido is a millionaire? Oh, Augustina, don’t believe these lies. Lola still thinks Guido is lame — she’s not wrong — and then Augustina proceeds to RIP HER THE FUCK APART. She’s like, “Don’t be getting mad at me because the only boy who likes you is a glasses-wearing stalker nerd, and the boy you like is too old for you and had a crush on your sister instead.” Damn. Lola storms off, and then Bianca and Augustina get all twitterpated because Pablo is coming over to talk to them. He tells Augustina that Guido doesn’t really like her, and then is like, “Oops, was I not supposed to say that?” Sol overhears this whole thing, and even she thinks that was a dick move.
Marizza leaves the work to Lujan and Laura, and runs off to see Manuel. On her way out from school, she nearly gets hit by a motorcyclist. The motorcyclist is WAY aggressive, asking for Marizza’s last name and shit. She’s understandably freaked out and runs off, with the guy staring after her all the while. CREEPY.
Tomás comes to see Ana, and thanks her for doing his homework for him. “I don’t know why you did it,” he says. Me either, Tomás. Me either. “Why not? We’re friends, right?” Ana says. Ana, friends don’t do each other’s homework. I mean, we do sometimes, but not every frickin’ day. Tomás asks Ana out, and they make a date for that night. Fernanda, Pilar, and Belen spy on them, all appalled that Tomás would date the cafeteria girl. Didn’t he do the same thing with Cata, and nobody gave a shit? I know Pilar is a social climber, but since when did Belen care about this kind of thing?
Augustina finds Guido and tells him that she feels dumb about their date last night, because she didn’t let him kiss her or anything, because she wants her first kiss to be with her boyfriend. I mean…unless she’s going out and hooking up with randos, I’m guessing that’s how it’s going to work out. Also, what does this even have to do with what Pablo told her? Does she think Guido doesn’t like her because she wouldn’t let him get to first base? NOTHING MAKES SENSE. She mentions her dad, and Guido’s reminded of her sweet, sweet connections to German imported cars. He tells her he doesn’t mind her being modest. I have never cared less about two people on this show. Like, even Blas and Mia make me feel a sense of dread and deep fury.
Half of Pablo’s face talks to someone on the phone about Guido stealing money from the pamphlet fund. He remains passive-aggressive when Guido actually rocks up to him, though. Guido tells Pablo that he’s more in love with Augustina than ever, and she loves him because he’s so honest and straightforward. Pablo’s like, “I don’t think those words mean what you think they mean.” Plan A having backfired, Pablo tries to fuck with Guido’s relationship again by advising that Guido should be a controlling asshole because chicks dig that.
Marizza rocks into the jail to save the day. She gets Manuel to see them by claiming they’re friends from Mexico. Manuel should know that he hasn’t kept in touch with a single damn person he knows from Mexico, ergo there is no reason any of them would be there. He refuses to talk to Mia, I guess because holding a grudge is more important to him than GETTING OUT OF JAIL.
Fernanda, Belen, and Pilar decide to fuck with Tomás and Ana’s date. First Fernanda tries to seduce Tomás into making a date with her. As we know, though, Tomás is dumb but not easily swayed. He refuses to break his date with Ana, although he won’t tell Fernanda who exactly it is that he has plans with. So Fernanda goes to Ana and makes up a whole story about how she needs someone to watch her sick grandmother tonight. Ana tries to refuse, but the Fernanda waves a ton of money at her, knowing Ana is broke as hell. Ana caves and writes a note to Tomás, breaking their date. She gives it to Fernanda to deliver. Sure, I bet that note will totally get to Tomás intact.
PILAS recruits Rocco to help them with the speech. He immediately reads it over and is like, “Yeah, this is shit.” Heh. I mean, I actually would buy that Rocco, with his love of music and film, might know something about good dialogue, so good job there, I guess.
Guido makes up the expense report for Pablo, presumably adding a ton more money so that he can take Augustina out on more dates. Half of Pablo’s face — seriously, why do they keep doing this? — freaks out at how much money it all is, and presses Guido if he thinks this is really the right amount. Guido’s like, “It totally is.” Just punch him, Pablo. I’d enjoy seeing that. I guess it’s hard to punch people when you only have 50% of your body. Did Benjamin Rojas have an unsightly zit or something?
Guido sits Augustina down and tells her that she’s not like other girls. Oh, ick. He loves how she’s not skanky like the rest of the girls at Elite Way! Oh, ICK! Augustina, run while you still can. Sadly, she thinks this is cute, and she hugs Guido. He’s like, “Ugh, I was nice to a girl and she won’t even slip me some tongue?” Guido has a Reddit account, doesn’t he?
We don’t see the rest of Manuel’s meeting with Marizza. Instead, she just tells Mia that Manuel is like, determined to get his ass imprisoned for the rest of his life, for reasons. You know, they don’t have hair dye in prison, Manuel. You’re gonna have to give up those frosted tips, and while I can live with that, can you? Mia and Marizza walk off all sadly, and the motorcyclist from earlier watches them. DUN DUN DUN!
And now, it’s time for the premiere of the new Erreway video! Yes, if you don’t live in the future, and had to wait several weeks for this moment, you can now watch “Para Cosas Buenas” after this episode. I’m mostly relieved that this episode wasn’t actually an hour long.
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